love Funny Status Messages

   To all the women I've dated. If we have a secret love child together that you never told me about, just have them get me a giftcard for Father's Day. Thanks!

   I love bald men with no dress sense that make me feel bad about myself....I swear I will marry one...ok?

   From the moment I saw u, I wanted to be inside u, I love ur smell, the way ur tongue feels, the way you tighten and loosen mmm..NEW SHOES

   I love running my fingers through my girlfriend's hair. It's also a great way to let her know we're out of napkins.

   We Found Love in a Swollen Face - Chris Brown ft. Rihanna

   Girls fall in love with what they hear... Guys fall in love with what they see. That is why girls wear makeup, and guys lie!

   When my girlfriend and I decided to make it official, I told her: I have to tell you, before we met, I was... well...promiscuous. Oh cool she exclaimed. I love Greek mythology.

   My bud just updated his Facebook status: "I love my girlfriend so much. You are my world xxxxx." I wonder why her name's encrypted.

   I love a hot chick in a football jersey. Or a regular shirt. Or a dress. Or naked. Whatever

   Love is always giving more than you can spare.

   Things to do.. #1 dig a hole #2 name it love #3 watch people fall in love

   I love haters! they're always thinkin of me!

   the only time love comes before sex is in the dictionary.

   It's hard to pretend you love someone when you don't, but it's harder to pretend you don't love someone when you really do.

   MARDI GRAS!!! Because who doesn't love pancakes and tequila!!!

   Love doesn't cost a thing but it can leave you bankrupt.

   Love is blind but marriage will open your eyes real quick.

   .not every flower can say love, but a rose did. Not every plant can survive thirst, but a cactus did. Not every retard can read, but look at you go!

   I would love to be a fly on the wall at this restaurant because it looks like the flies are having some kind of party on the wall!

   Dear nose-phobic as*holes who made fun of me when I was a kid. Over the years, I have made almost nine figures in royalties from my TV special - while YOU clowns were strapped to the hood of some dude's truck. Karma's a b*tch. Love, Rudolph