markf Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon thinking that now that I have a laptop computer, iPhone, GPS and tablet PC, my ADD is actually a positive thing now.
←Rate | 12-29-2010 19:20 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon heard the bad news that dozens of NYC ambulances are out of service due to snowdrifts piled high in the streets. The good news is there are dozens of lawyers out of service now, too.
←Rate | 12-29-2010 18:58 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon would like to see a more man-friendly mall for next Christmas. It needs to have a Home Depot, AutoZone, Bass Pro Shop, Lowe's, Sears, Gander Mtn, Pep Boys, a Longhorn Steakhouse and ESPN radio playing over the christmas tunes.
←Rate | 12-23-2010 07:32 by markf Comments (1)  


   messageicon dreaming of a 'backcolor=#FFFFFF' Christmas.
←Rate | 12-15-2010 08:05 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon likes the Hide button so much that he is now working on one for the laundry.
←Rate | 12-06-2010 07:14 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon wants to point out that real men don't sparkle.
←Rate | 12-06-2010 06:58 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon happy that President Obama recently visited India. Maybe now we can start sending jobs in Congress offshore.
←Rate | 11-18-2010 09:49 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinking that Venti must be the Italian word for "you just paid an insane amount of money for a cup of coffee."
←Rate | 11-18-2010 09:43 by markf Comments (1)  


   messageicon wondering what Captain Hook's name was before he lost his hand.
←Rate | 11-18-2010 09:39 by markf Comments (5)  


   messageicon thinks it's funny that the Carnival cruise ship passengers were complaining about having no showers and eating nothing but Spam and Pop-Tarts. Right now thousands of male computer science majors are trying to find out how to sign up for the next cruise.
←Rate | 11-12-2010 07:12 by markf Comments (3)  


   messageicon relieved to see Facebook finally expanded the Religion choice to include Amish, for all those Amish people out there with computers.
←Rate | 10-12-2010 12:20 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon heard that Bruce Willis is working on the next Die Hard movie. Working titles are Die Hard: The Colonoscopy or Die Hard: Medicare with a Vengeance.
←Rate | 10-08-2010 12:59 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon wonders if someone driving a VW bug knows they are causing fistfights wherever they go.
←Rate | 09-15-2010 22:06 by markf Comments (1)  


   messageicon thinking they need to rename 'Dancing with the Stars' to 'Dancing with the National Enquirer.'
←Rate | 09-06-2010 08:40 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks the markets are sliding faster today than a disgruntled flight attendant.
←Rate | 08-12-2010 13:32 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering why someone would put down their needle anywhere near a haystack.
←Rate | 07-01-2010 07:58 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon passed a door in the stairwell with the sign: "Door is Alarmed." I told it to relax, everything is going to be okay.
←Rate | 06-30-2010 09:00 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering why people with bad breath are always wanting to tell me a secret.
←Rate | 06-30-2010 08:48 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering why cameras have round lenses that take square pictures.
←Rate | 06-25-2010 19:41 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon getting ready for May 21st (this Friday) which is Talk Like Yoda Day...practicing we should be, hmm?
←Rate | 05-18-2010 10:04 by markf Comments (0)  




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