CJ Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I bet Bin laden now reqrets letting his Facebook "Check In" at his current location
←Rate | 05-02-2011 11:39 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you're talking behind my back, you're in a good position to kiss my a$$!!
←Rate | 05-01-2011 17:59 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the Husband, sharks for the husbands mother.
←Rate | 04-17-2011 11:04 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon My blood type is Dutch Bros.
←Rate | 04-13-2011 11:29 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine!
←Rate | 04-13-2011 11:29 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Customers, Yes, we are making fun of you in Vietnamese. Sincerely, Nail Salon Ladies!!
←Rate | 04-07-2011 12:12 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy Wife = Happy Life
←Rate | 03-30-2011 12:30 by CJ Comments (1)  


   messageicon I remember when I was a kid I used to come home from Sunday School and my mother would get drunk and try to make pancakes”
←Rate | 03-27-2011 12:08 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon LOVE ~ It's a special kind of stupid.....
←Rate | 03-22-2011 16:11 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon BEER!!!! now cheaper than gas...DRINK......DON'T DRIVE!!!!!
←Rate | 03-15-2011 00:51 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Somewhere out there, someone's grandma's recipe for dill bread reads ".. allow dill dough to rise".
←Rate | 03-02-2011 10:31 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick.
←Rate | 02-21-2011 12:05 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child's name and how old he or she is.
←Rate | 02-21-2011 12:04 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, "keep away from children."
←Rate | 02-21-2011 12:02 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sing out loud in the car even, or especially, if it embarrasses your children.
←Rate | 02-21-2011 12:01 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?
←Rate | 02-21-2011 11:59 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out.
←Rate | 02-21-2011 11:58 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
←Rate | 02-17-2011 15:01 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon BATHROOM: A room used by the entire family, believed by all except Mom to be self-cleaning.
←Rate | 02-17-2011 14:54 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just got my confirmation! I'm on the guest list for Charlie Sheen's Brews, Blow & Hoe's party.
←Rate | 02-16-2011 09:32 by CJ Comments (0)  




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