Czovczov Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon My wife is upset, apparently I'm breathing wrong again.
←Rate | 08-23-2012 14:02 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oh for god sake, just fall in love with me already so I can stop acting normal.
←Rate | 09-07-2012 14:10 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tomorrow you'll be able to stop hating people for their political views and go back to hating them for their personality!
←Rate | 11-06-2012 13:52 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't play "Hard To Get" , I play "It's Never Going To Happen"
←Rate | 12-19-2011 12:59 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon You guys make Facebook worth it! Just kidding, we are all wasting our lives here.
←Rate | 05-19-2012 13:43 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife's safe word: "Not tonight"
←Rate | 12-23-2012 04:29 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's amazing how many people are diagnosed with a disease as soon as there's a pill available for it.
←Rate | 03-30-2014 11:09 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ghetto word of the day: COLOGNE. Usage: "You think you cologne me a dollar or two?"
←Rate | 01-14-2012 13:20 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best part about going to Wal-Mart is having the book aisles all to yourself.
←Rate | 03-02-2014 11:20 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon They key to forgiving somebody is to remember that sometimes, you're an a$$hole, too.
←Rate | 09-25-2012 09:48 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only good part about reuniting with an ex is that having sex with them doesn't change the number of people you've slept with.
←Rate | 03-03-2012 13:47 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate situations where I have to acknowledge the people I had been successfully ignoring.
←Rate | 01-06-2012 15:33 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon You haven't experienced awkwardness and felt like a complete idiot until you try to tickle someone who isn't ticklish.
←Rate | 10-21-2012 07:55 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes when I cut my toenails, I leave them all over the floor just in case ants need to use them as swords when they are at war.
←Rate | 11-11-2011 01:03 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon I carry a gun because I'd rather be judged by 12 than carried by six.
←Rate | 11-08-2012 12:30 by Czovczov Comments (1)  


   messageicon Lazy rule: Can't reach it. Don't need it.
←Rate | 11-10-2011 12:29 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nike: Just Do It. Crocs: Just Don't.
←Rate | 03-28-2015 12:36 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon I pity those who feel the need to brag about themselves to get people's attention. I hate them more than the scratch on my Lamborghini.
←Rate | 07-12-2013 13:16 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think the best way to prove to an ex that you don't think about them anymore is to write and produce a song saying so.
←Rate | 02-26-2012 07:04 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Please don't bore your friends with your troubles and worries. Tell your enemies instead, who will be delighted to hear about them.
←Rate | 04-17-2012 10:34 by Czovczov Comments (0)  




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