Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 4815 of 6371
Once upon a time, GIRLS used to cook like their mothers,but now they drink like their Fathers...!!!
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06-05-2011 05:27
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Sunday is here again...time to put on our christianity hats and act all holly and mighty while we pretend to care about god and his 10 commandments.
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06-05-2011 03:33
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when you see her name on dialled , missed and receive calls , you know she is your girl friend
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06-05-2011 02:27
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if God created us in his image why the Hell don't we have powers?
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06-05-2011 01:31
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I put my WELCOME mat on the inside of my house so the world doesn't seem so scary when I leave.
I remember when 69 was just a number..BJ's was just a store.. & doggy style was a way to swim.
Life may not always give us chances, but it always gives us choices.
Love me? Great. Hate me? Even better. Think I'm ugly? Don't look at me. Don't know me? Don't judge me. Think you know me? You have no idea
Relationships are like sharing a book. It doesn't work if you're not on the same page.
Ok... I was thinking My wife has 988 friends on FaceBook and knows 15 of them in person I have only 66 BUT I know ALL of them......???
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06-04-2011 21:44
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Found your nose again...it was in my business! Watched your wedding video backwards again...my favorite part it where he takes off the ring and leaves the church!
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06-04-2011 21:04
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I hate when I find parking space and there's already a motorcycle parked in it.
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06-04-2011 20:18 by BRian
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Satisfied isnt her telling you how great you were afterwards....Satisfied is her being unable too speak afterwards...I Do Work Son!!
If you aren't going to neuter your male dog then please make him wear underwear. I don't wanna see his junk anymore than I wanna see your's.
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06-04-2011 19:47
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ThatMomentOfPanic as a kid when one of your parents is coming at you with a belt..................."Do I stay or do I run!!!"
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06-04-2011 19:19
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You might as well do your Christmas hinting early...
K.Y. Slip-n-Slide party at my place tonight!
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06-04-2011 17:12
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Okay, I'll stop. But shouldn't I listen first, THEN collaborate?
I can't tell the difference between Coke and Pepsi, or right and wrong for that matter.
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06-04-2011 16:24
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It takes longer than 2 years to clean up 8 years of Elephant Dung but feel free to blame it on the guy with the broom.
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06-04-2011 16:08
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