bego Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I accidentally bumped into my ex today... with my car... at 60mph... on purpose.
←Rate | 09-23-2012 21:53 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am strong because I know my weaknesses. I am alive because i'ma a fighter. I am wise because i've been foolish. and I've laughed because i've known sadness.
←Rate | 06-12-2011 23:32 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Jamaican GPS' would be soo great. “TURN AROUND, MON. YOU GOIN' DE WRONG WAY. TURN DE ODDA WAY MON. KEEP GOIN' DATTA WAY, MON. TURN COMIN' UP ON DE NEXT LEFT. YOU GOT DIS, MON.”
←Rate | 12-03-2011 22:00 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon The most annoying sound = When a fly comes into your house and gets stuck in between the window and the blinds.
←Rate | 07-25-2012 21:36 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon My favorite condiment is sarcasm, I put it on everything.
←Rate | 06-01-2012 21:38 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wal-Mart needs to change their slogan to "what has been seen can never be unseen."
←Rate | 04-19-2012 21:03 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Go ahead and play "hard to get"...I'll be over here playing "don't give a s$it"
←Rate | 06-18-2012 22:19 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's God's job to judge the terrorists...it's our mission to arrange the meeting." -U.S. Marines
←Rate | 09-17-2012 21:05 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just realized I can make 50 funny faces at my boss in less than 30 seconds while the elevator door closes. Anyway, got fired.
←Rate | 07-06-2011 22:07 by BEGO Comments (1)  


   messageicon When I'm a millionare, I'm hiring someone whose only job is to stand at the top of a stairwell and high-five me when I get to the top.
←Rate | 03-30-2012 21:45 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Note to Self: Wearing headphones do not make my farts silent.
←Rate | 04-12-2012 19:59 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon When my wife picks a restaraunt that I don’t like, I just say “oh yeah, that’s where that really cute girl works”. Problem solved.
←Rate | 04-19-2013 21:45 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Best Relationship: Talk like bestfriends, play like children, argue like husband and wife, protect each other like brother and sister.
←Rate | 11-18-2012 22:49 by BEGO Comments (1)  


   messageicon Girls who say, "a lot of guys are after me", should keep in mind that low prices always attract many customers
←Rate | 11-10-2012 21:52 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon A Brief History of Our Times: As televisions became flatter, people became rounder. 
←Rate | 06-18-2012 22:24 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon You're so fake, Barbie is jealous
←Rate | 07-25-2010 22:55 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love don't cost a thing." Except a lot of tears, a broken heart, and wasted years.
←Rate | 09-25-2010 23:59 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Universal truth: sun rises in the East Fact: sun neither rises nor sets, the Earth rotates... Moral: Education kills our Common Sense
←Rate | 07-01-2012 22:58 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon FEAR = F*ck Everything And Run.
←Rate | 11-15-2011 21:53 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon In his last act of terrorism, Osama Bin Laden is blowing up my facebook newsfeed.
←Rate | 05-03-2011 15:46 by BEGO Comments (0)  




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