Geez Funny Status Messages

   climbing into your windows and snatchin yo people up...

   I just saw Inception and I'm pretty sure I dreamt that movie the other night...

   You ever seen someone so gay that you feared for his safety!

   Motorola is coming out with a new droid phone called the Kobe... conversely, they are also coming out with the Lebron phone too, except the only difference is it doesn't RING.

   you know that feeling when you pick your nose and it all comes out in one long string... thats how I feel right now!

   Man tried to hitch on an Airbus by hiding inside the landing tire... people say he was terminally ill! what a turbulent life...

   *holding my shirt* excuse miss, would you consider this boyfriend material?!?!

   Wouldn't you think that lego people give the perfect hand jobs!?!?!

   Spain or Germany??? --Spermany!

   Very opposed to the Ground Zero Mosque but only cuz I think we need a Ground Zero Chick-Fil-A first.

   What a tortured soul... He never really figured out what Willis was talking about....

   Actors in India must hate always being type-caste!

   Lou Gehrig didn't have Lou Gehrig's disease. What's next? We find out Hugh Downs doesn't have Down's syndrome?

   what do you tell a woman who has two black eyes... nothing you've already told her twice!

   it just me or does anyone else die a little bit inside when they lose an fb friend? *tear!*

   I'm gonna check out The Social Network, except I'm not gonna actually watch the movie. I'm gonna just check out everybody while they are watching the movie.

   Trump looks like the rich dad on Law and Order whose son accidentally strangles the hooker.

   Are orphans allowed to watch PG movies???

   Obama is in town. Traffic is bad. I won't be able to vote for him in 2012 because I'll still be sitting in my car.

   I don't know if I walked in to the wrong restroom, but it smells like fish in the men's room.