thejoke.cafe Funny Status Messages
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Filled the tank up with petrol today. Now all the fish are dead.
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I can't believe so many Americans from the Bible Belt plan to vote for Trump. If he gets to build his wall, he'll be keeping Jesus out of the country.
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The most used electrical appliance in the wife’s kitchen is the smoke alarm.
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America’s policy of shooting first and asking questions later has always been their downfall. I mean, just think how useful King Kong could have been on September the 11th.
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Sticker given to Trump supporters at the polls: "I Voted" Sticker given to Hillary supporters at the polls: "I Rigged"
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What is the biggest city in America ? Obesity.
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Why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet? Because she didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills.
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I think Christmas must be near, The bin man said good morning to me.
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I was telling my wife how my New Years resolution is to try and be a happier person. “That’s lovely” she said, giving me a hug. “I’m glad you think so” I replied. “Your bag’s by the front door”.
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Black Friday: Because only in America, people trample ovee others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have.
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What are the strongest days of the week? Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.
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Carrie Fisher was found unconscious by a relative,who tried to revive her with chest compressions. Unfortunately, the force wasn't strong enough.
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