Moon Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon I can't get over how intelligent smartphones are getting as mine just filmed a 20-minute documentary about itself all on its own about its life in a pocket.
←Rate | 03-12-2019 01:57 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't understand people who say the moon landings were fake? I mean what did the government spend the 24 billion dollars on? To pay hundreds of thousands of people working on the Apollo program to sit around and play checkers?
←Rate | 04-30-2019 15:20 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Okay buddy if you want to sit behind me and honk your horn for waving someone ahead of me at four-way stop sign then I think I'll do the polite thing and wave the next five cars on while I update my current status.
←Rate | 02-26-2019 11:30 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Want to know the secret to happiness? Deactivate your Facebook account like people used to take the phone off the hook.
←Rate | 04-03-2019 13:50 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't know why but I always end up making just a little bit too much spaghetti for myself to eat. Anyways, if anyone's hungry come on over. And bring like five friends.
←Rate | 05-13-2019 21:17 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Shout out to all my friends who never post, like or say anything on Facebook, You're my heroes! But if you silent friend's could do me one little favor and like just this one status so I'll know your still out there breathing and actually give a damn wha
←Rate | 03-01-2019 12:40 by moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I just burnt 550 calories without doing anything. And that's the last time I look at Facebook with pizza in the oven!
←Rate | 07-06-2019 14:32 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon When a girl says "Aw that's that's very sweet of you" to a male friend who asks her out on a date what she's really trying to say is "Back into the friends zone with you!"
←Rate | 12-27-2018 15:08 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon So if no one posted pictures of the lunar eclipse for friends who don't look up from their phones did it really happen?
←Rate | 01-21-2019 01:00 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Rain rain go away so I don't waste all my time staring at Facebook all day.
←Rate | 02-20-2019 09:20 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Whoever designed my new phone that uses power to light up, beep and shake on and off for 15 minutes or so before it dies should be fired.
←Rate | 06-28-2019 02:22 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Shout out to the guy in the Beamer who gave me the finger for honking and waving at him. Your cell phone is on the roof of your car!
←Rate | 07-22-2019 12:08 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you touch your phone in all the right places a pizza will arrive at your door.
←Rate | 12-18-2018 10:09 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Roses are red, facebook is blue no mutual friends, who the hell are you?
←Rate | 10-29-2018 22:48 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you want to know who your real facebook fiends are all you have to do is post that you got a new phone and need numbers.
←Rate | 12-31-2018 08:19 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon After much consideration I've decided not to host the Grammys this year.
←Rate | 01-31-2019 10:21 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Okay, time to be productive!....or in other words log out of facebook. Which by the way is the secret to my success.
←Rate | 04-15-2019 22:12 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Thanks to Facebook me and my friend's can now send each other invites and make plans months in advance like we're going on an expedition to the upper reaches of Mongolia to get together for a cup of coffee.
←Rate | 07-17-2019 21:50 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon For Sale. Slightly used Christmas tree. Price negotiable. Can pick up in front of neighbor's house.
←Rate | 01-23-2019 09:49 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Sorry I can never be serous on facebook as it's just a website that shouldn't be taken too seriously. Like seriously.
←Rate | 03-16-2019 09:36 by Moon Comments (0)  

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