Moon Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Life is like a box of chocolates you never know which one you going to get, if you can't follow directions and just look at the little chart on the back of the box.
←Rate | 02-16-2019 23:53 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I think some of my friends are completely irrational and make bad decisions, and we should hang out more.
←Rate | 11-13-2018 13:35 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's amazing how far humans have come since the caveman days when people used to communicate by writing on walls....oh wait, we still do. Never mind.
←Rate | 05-12-2019 12:25 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm so old I remember when friends had to inviting you over if they wanted to share what they were having for dinner.
←Rate | 01-09-2020 14:36 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'll never understand those baby on board signs? Like thanks for letting me know as I was just about to purposely ram my car into yours for absolutely no apparent reason until I saw your sign!
←Rate | 12-15-2018 18:19 by Moon Comments (1)  

   messageicon I just cleaned up my friends list. So if you could see this post it means you've made the cut because you're special! Or my worst enemy I just want to keep an eye on.
←Rate | 01-09-2019 11:24 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Thanks to Facebook birthday reminders I know who to unfriend after thinking who the heck is this person?
←Rate | 06-03-2019 11:50 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Wish there was a way to turn horrible books back into trees.
←Rate | 09-01-2019 08:53 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm going to get married on February 29th so I only have to remember our anniversary once every 4 years.
←Rate | 02-23-2020 22:39 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I can't get over how intelligent smartphones are getting as mine just filmed a 20-minute documentary about itself all on its own about its life in a pocket.
←Rate | 03-12-2019 01:57 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't understand people who say the moon landings were fake? I mean what did the government spend the 24 billion dollars on? To pay hundreds of thousands of people working on the Apollo program to sit around and play checkers?
←Rate | 04-30-2019 15:20 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Okay buddy if you want to sit behind me and honk your horn for waving someone ahead of me at four-way stop sign then I think I'll do the polite thing and wave the next five cars on while I update my current status.
←Rate | 02-26-2019 11:30 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Want to know the secret to happiness? Deactivate your Facebook account like people used to take the phone off the hook.
←Rate | 04-03-2019 13:50 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't know why but I always end up making just a little bit too much spaghetti for myself to eat. Anyways, if anyone's hungry come on over. And bring like five friends.
←Rate | 05-13-2019 21:17 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon What came first the chicken or the egg all depends on whether or not I'm having breakfast or dinner.
←Rate | 02-17-2020 11:29 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Shout out to all my friends who never post, like or say anything on Facebook, You're my heroes! But if you silent friend's could do me one little favor and like just this one status so I'll know your still out there breathing and actually give a damn wha
←Rate | 03-01-2019 12:40 by moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I just burnt 550 calories without doing anything. And that's the last time I look at Facebook with pizza in the oven!
←Rate | 07-06-2019 14:32 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Last year my New Year's resolution was to loss 30 lbs and now that we're about to ring in another New Year I'm happy to say that I've only got 40 more pounds to go!
←Rate | 12-31-2019 23:04 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just when I was getting use to writing 2019
←Rate | 01-01-2020 10:11 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm so old I......just forgot what I was going to post?
←Rate | 01-04-2020 13:55 by Moon Comments (0)  

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