bego Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I solve many of my problems by simply ignoring them
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:28 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I once took a girl to Starbucks because I forgot her name
←Rate | 08-31-2015 22:07 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can party much longer than my cell phone battery.
←Rate | 02-07-2014 21:29 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hope popcorn appreciates what the microwave did for its career.
←Rate | 11-10-2012 21:51 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook is cheaper than therapy, twice as effective & you can do it naked.
←Rate | 06-18-2012 22:24 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey Facebook, I really don't care that somebody commented on a post that I commented on seven days ago.
←Rate | 07-06-2012 21:21 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some people might as well post ‘Wants Attention' as their Facebook status.
←Rate | 12-07-2011 20:22 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing like sitting back and watching the people who stabbed you in the back fall apart.
←Rate | 12-29-2011 19:15 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon The closest friends are the ones that know too much.
←Rate | 03-23-2012 21:13 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have a lot of friends practicing law without a degree. They all want to judge me.
←Rate | 09-28-2011 22:20 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Laugh now, but at the rate they are reproducing, the people of Walmart may one day take over the world
←Rate | 04-05-2013 20:57 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I could have a superpower, it would be the ability to watch people work out and absorb the benefits for myself.
←Rate | 12-23-2015 23:45 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon How are you feeling today? Like a tampon. In a good place... At the wrong time.
←Rate | 06-18-2012 22:17 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Alcohol makes me worse at everything except telling secrets.
←Rate | 07-01-2012 22:33 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon i don’t understand why people need to do drugs or party in order to have fun, have you tried mac n cheese
←Rate | 04-26-2013 21:22 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon That moment when you are so drunk that you swerve to miss a tree but then you realize its just an air freshener hanging in your car.
←Rate | 04-08-2012 21:36 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Please don't put a million dumb photos of me on your Facebook... it just annoys your friends" - Every baby
←Rate | 04-27-2013 23:15 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon People dont even say grace before meals anymore . They just hold their phone over the plate, snap a picture, & then upload it to instagram .
←Rate | 05-03-2013 21:26 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I guess it's "No Pull Out" season. Almost every chick on Facebook is pregnant.
←Rate | 05-03-2013 21:13 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon If the government fails to raise the debt ceiling and stops paying their bills, I will stop paying mine, fair is fair
←Rate | 07-31-2011 22:19 by BEGO Comments (0)  




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