Lemonpillow Funny Status Messages
Search results for status messages containing 'Lemonpillow': View All Messages
Page: 32 of 40
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
This status was sent from inside the Channel Tunnel. Try that on your precious iPhones.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you're in it, but the longer you stay, the more wrinkled you get.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
You don't have to be good at anagrams to see that Pope Benedict is an Epic Bent Pedo.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
..oh dear. Some special ed class somewhere is missing a student..
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
Did you hear about the gay dwarf? He came out of the cupboard.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
Get away from me! What am i? Flypaper for freaks?
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
My cosmetic surgery might have gone wrong but I'm smiling on the inside.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
Don't reach for the stars. You'll just look like a idiot stretching for no reason.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
If God meant me to be naked, he would have made my skin fit better.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
..is working on her bad intentions since the road to Hell is paved with good ones.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
God created man before woman... but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
I explained to the doctor, "Whenever I harvest our cornfields, I get a really bad headache." "It's a migraine," he explained. "No, it's not, it's mine - and why the hell have you started speaking Italian?"
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
Exercise programme: Take one Weetabix. Take an Aero chocolate bar.Crumble the Aero over the Weetabix. Voila. Aerobix.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
If you're going to have two faces, you'd think you'd make one of them attractive
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
People used to protest things... Now they just join Facebook groups named 1,000,000 strong against ___________ .
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
Two Irish couples decide to spice up their sex lives by swapping partners.Paddy says "that was great, I wonder how the girls got on?"
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
..just has this way of lighting up a room whenever she walks in. She flips a switch.
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
...is a Vagitarian. :-)
![messageicon](images/button/quote.png)
Anything that is not about elephants is irrelphant.
[Search Results] [View All Messages]