Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon The answer to the Westboro Baptist Church protests of military funerals is to aim the 21 gun salute at them.
←Rate | 07-03-2013 15:31 by Tim Comments (0)  


   messageicon K-Mart is noting the 5 year anniversary of Michael Jackson's death by having children's clothing half off.
←Rate | 06-25-2014 16:14 by Trax Comments (0)  


   messageicon Question ... Which Democrat candidate has given up any of their earnings in the name of income inequality? Answer .... Neither .... They are both hypocrites!!!
←Rate | 05-06-2016 14:27 Comments (3)  


   messageicon Here's an idea: Let's put the MSM in quarantine for 30 days to stop the spread of Fake News.
←Rate | 04-14-2020 22:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon such an adrenaline junky that when I see a 'caution wet floor sign' I walk faster
←Rate | 09-15-2009 12:13 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon if at first you don't succeed, won't hurt to smoke some weed
←Rate | 04-30-2010 07:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw a nun on a wheelchair today and I could think of is.... Virgin mobile
←Rate | 04-30-2011 21:34 by Usucknoob Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dont let those people hurt you when they call you fat. Just keep your chins up!!
←Rate | 03-07-2012 00:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dont Bring Skittels To A Gun Fight
←Rate | 04-16-2012 21:15 by Diabolical Inc. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Vick is abusing those cowboys worse than he did his dogs
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from vegetarian club. I think she was mistaken. I'd never met herbivore.
←Rate | 10-18-2011 12:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Roses are gray, Violets are gray, Crap. I'm a dog
←Rate | 03-12-2012 14:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon rip joe paterno - his glasses will be donated to science and studied to see if they allow you to see anything!!
←Rate | 01-22-2012 12:04 by paulwall Comments (0)  


   messageicon roses are red, violets are blue...valentine's crap is over now don't you have some ironing to do?
←Rate | 02-22-2012 15:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't think I know half of my FB friends....Who the heck are you people?
←Rate | 03-04-2012 20:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Stop reading this and go have some sex
←Rate | 06-21-2012 17:38 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Adele's ex-boyfriend and Gotye's ex-girlfriend should totally hook up.
←Rate | 05-14-2012 21:17 by J Comments (0)  


   messageicon Antifa .. same party, same tactics, different hood
←Rate | 07-15-2019 23:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't believe they remade the Pink Panther movie and changed the name since it stars a b|@ck guy instead. It is just pathetic how blatantly unoriginal Hollywood has gotten these days.
←Rate | 02-19-2018 07:27 Comments (2)  


   messageicon Dear women, if you want men to look at your face and not your chest eat a banana.
←Rate | 07-02-2013 18:24 by Tim Comments (0)  




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