DYLAN BOSCH Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup; the best part is remembering the name of the person sleeping next to you.
←Rate | 03-01-2010 17:22 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon I do not understand how a phone that starts your car can be a selling point. If someone steals your phone, they not only have your car, but more than likely your facebook, which let's face it, is scarier than losing a car.
←Rate | 05-09-2011 14:31 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon Google and Me, it's like we finish eachother's sentences."
←Rate | 07-13-2010 22:12 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon Misunderstanding one word can make all the difference - like the time my girlfriend said that she'd like me to splurge on her occasionally."
←Rate | 05-09-2011 14:26 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon Everytime I drink I break my "No" button. Yes, I want another drink. Yes, you can take me home. Yes, I'm sure I can drive. Yes, I will dance on the bar."
←Rate | 05-12-2011 12:11 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon I remember when I was younger "Friday the 13th" used to make me think about Jason movies. Now all I can think about is "Do the bars have any specials today?"
←Rate | 05-13-2011 11:42 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon When moving walkways in airports warn me to watch my step because, "The walkway is coming to a end", my first thought is "I'm moving 2 mph, that is ridiculous." Then when I get to the end all I can think is "Oh crap, I better not mess this up."
←Rate | 03-04-2011 23:36 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Klondike Bar found out what I did for it, and now it's blackmailing me."
←Rate | 08-20-2010 20:03 by Dylan Bosch Comments (1)  


   messageicon you know you've been going to alot of bars lately when you walk into a local McDonald's to buy a burger and accidently hand the guy at the register you're I.D."
←Rate | 11-17-2010 23:27 by Dylan Bosch Comments (1)  


   messageicon Why Did Donkey Kong even bother throwing barrels? Why not let Mario get up to his level and then just beat the sh!t out of him?"
←Rate | 02-28-2010 15:40 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon Having a wireless mouse makes it way too tempting to throw it across the room when my computer gives me trouble."
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:25 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know if I Should be mad at you or my phone.. because when you called me under "Restricted" my phone didn't use your specific ringtone. so now I'm stuck talking to you!!"
←Rate | 05-14-2010 13:49 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon if Osama really did believe that he was getting all those virgin's after death,.. umm.. then why the f*ck was he hiding for ten years?"
←Rate | 05-02-2011 11:33 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon you know you're totally screwed when the guy who stole your identity begs you to take it back."
←Rate | 09-13-2011 19:14 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon it says on my sidebar on facebook.. "Many of people who like Lindsey Lohan also liked Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen" Oh no, that can't be good.
←Rate | 09-02-2010 21:07 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you didn't hear it with your OWN ears or see it with your OWN eyes, don't go passing it on with your OWN mouth!"
←Rate | 03-05-2011 10:52 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon The true test of inner strength is finding both stalls occupied."
←Rate | 03-04-2011 11:23 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon maybe Disney should start having there girls sign contracts before making them famous. Like, "I Promise I will not be America's next pop wh*re if I get this part..."
←Rate | 08-26-2013 18:19 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know college has changed you when you see your 6 year old niece drinking out of a red plastic cup, and you scream, "Don't drink that... juice." Oh.
←Rate | 08-24-2011 00:45 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw some footage of some polar bears drinking water... it's obviously fake. Everybody knows they only drink Coca-Cola."
←Rate | 04-21-2011 20:31 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  




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