doc Noland Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I never wear cologne to an important meeting. I bench an old fridge 10x & let my jungle pheromones show them who's boss.
←Rate | 04-29-2011 19:21 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon its sad when fat girls lose weight only to discover they dont have a pretty face.
←Rate | 05-11-2011 08:37 by doc noland Comments (1)  


   messageicon knows if you like drunk girls in high heels, you may also be attracted to newborn ponies
←Rate | 05-11-2011 08:40 by doc noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering, would It be fun if we started calling gynecologists, "tw@t dentists".
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:29 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon has Finally figured out the difference between us. You're me if I tried too hard!
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:30 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon hoping to be part of a wordless briefcase exchange someday.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 19:12 by doc noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Rebecca Black is pregnant... she should have gotten in the front seat, not the back seat.
←Rate | 05-15-2011 14:17 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey Old Navy Mannequins, stop trying so hard, you're embarrassing yourself.
←Rate | 05-16-2011 15:20 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just winked at myself in a mirror and physically felt the soul leave my body.
←Rate | 05-17-2011 17:51 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering, can I still use the big stall if my handicap is being emotionally crippled?
←Rate | 05-17-2011 18:14 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Auto correct is like having a 4 year old play mad-libs with your email.
←Rate | 05-19-2011 02:55 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon could go to prison for the things he has typed into his notes app on his Droid
←Rate | 05-24-2011 16:11 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon likes calling Ketchup, "meatloaf hot fudge".
←Rate | 05-24-2011 16:13 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Drunk sex is ok, but drunk hugs are frantastic
←Rate | 05-24-2011 16:14 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon You haven't lived until you've passed through a birth canal.
←Rate | 05-29-2011 09:30 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wearing your Oakleys backwards is a stylish way to let people know you're amped about giving them HPV.
←Rate | 05-29-2011 09:31 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did you fall from heaven? Because your face is kinda messed up.
←Rate | 05-31-2011 00:07 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm bad with stains. Does anyone know how to get fat out from under a t-shirt?
←Rate | 05-31-2011 23:35 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kim Kardashian wants her bachelorette party to be low key, just an E! camera crew and 100 black dudes dragging their sacks across her face.
←Rate | 05-31-2011 23:39 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got a new phone Friday, it has Texas Hold 'em installed and OH MY FREAKING GOSH IS IT SUNDAY ALREADY?????
←Rate | 05-31-2011 23:49 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  




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