Snotty Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I saw a guy walking 4 dogs this morning and thought, Wow!.. That guy must be really blind.
←Rate | 08-01-2013 07:03 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yes,,, The bathrooms by the pool are a nice touch but completely unnecessary.
←Rate | 08-23-2013 08:00 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon My doctor is getting REALLY tired of me asking if the stuff I see in commercials is right for me.
←Rate | 01-05-2013 10:31 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon We all lose if CBS doesn't film the next Survivor aboard a Carnival Cruise Ship.
←Rate | 03-16-2013 22:27 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Well, today was a complete waste of clean clothes.
←Rate | 10-20-2013 07:31 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Balloons are so much more expensive than when I was a kid... Probably due to,,,,, you know,, inflation.
←Rate | 12-11-2016 19:24 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just learned the population of sheep in New Zealand is 60 Million..... How long did someone have to stay awake to figure that out?
←Rate | 04-13-2013 10:32 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thank you for installing Adobe Flash. A new version is available. Install?.. <YES>.. Thank you for installing Adobe Flash. A new version is available. Install?. <YES>.. Thank you for installing Adobe Flash. A new version is available. Install?
←Rate | 09-05-2016 15:50 by Snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cashier: Your total is $2,334.00... Me: Can you take off the avocado?... Cashier: Okay, that will be $2.00.
←Rate | 11-19-2016 20:05 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon My Chinese waiter put my food down in front of another white guy who looked nothing like me. I get it now.............Wait, That's not my waiter
←Rate | 03-26-2013 21:58 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I bite into a York peppermint patty,, I get the sensation,,,,,, That I should have bought a Reese's peanut butter cup...
←Rate | 07-02-2012 20:42 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll defend puppies & kittens with my life.. But if your kid's acting like a spoiled brat...I will ABSOLUTELY knock him over when you're not looking.
←Rate | 04-08-2012 08:27 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Molasses is surprisingly tasty,,,, However, I have to admit,,, I have never actually tried any other parts of a mole yet,,so,,,,,,
←Rate | 12-13-2011 13:00 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whole Foods sells $10 gift cards... The perfect gift for a loved one who wants two onions.
←Rate | 10-28-2012 23:31 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just found out I got another A in my daughter's science class.
←Rate | 10-04-2013 07:53 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Being an adult is mostly being exhausted, wishing you hadn't made plans, and wondering how you hurt your back.
←Rate | 06-05-2014 19:08 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon So sad that out of 200 countries in this world,, America ranks 35th in the world in math... But at least that keeps us still in the top 10%
←Rate | 06-12-2012 09:05 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Math Problem: If Matt has 16 oz of coffee and loses 4 oz at each of 5 speed bumps going into work, how many seconds until Matt kills everyone?
←Rate | 03-21-2012 20:15 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me 42,337 times,, and you are a weather man.
←Rate | 02-29-2012 07:21 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Can you even imagine how long the Carfax report is on the Batmobile
←Rate | 10-12-2013 14:37 by snotty Comments (0)  




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