Moon Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Loving and all these Christmas photos you're posting of your families who look as joyous and festive as the family who came with a picture frame I bought a while ago, who I also don't know.
←Rate | 12-26-2018 13:21 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon For sale: Slightly used Christmas tree. Can pick up in front of neighbors house.
←Rate | 12-28-2018 07:53 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon With facebook down I went back to doing those little things we sometimes overlook while it's up, like keeping the dishes from polling up in the sink, folding the laundry on top of the dryer, finishing reading those books I started reading and showering.
←Rate | 03-14-2019 10:28 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon "No, I just carry it around to look cool" was my reply after being asked "Do you play?" in regards to the guitar on my back.
←Rate | 03-04-2019 09:16 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Coming out can be hard as people don't understand our way of life and can be very close minded, but I feel in this day and age I can no longer be afraid to say I love Disco!
←Rate | 07-11-2019 19:50 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Like this status if you're the type of person who likes to carry all your groceries into your house in one trip, but then realize at the front door you have so many bags in your hands you can't get the keys out of pocket.
←Rate | 06-16-2019 14:59 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just once in my life I'd love to make just the perfect amount of spaghetti for myself. Anyways, if you're hungry come on over. And bring like five friends.
←Rate | 02-01-2019 00:06 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Shoutout to the guy driving the BMW who gave me the finger after I honked at you. Your cell phone's on top of your car!
←Rate | 04-12-2019 21:53 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you think you can win me over with just food music and a pretty face your damn right!
←Rate | 05-18-2019 09:37 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Where did we go wrong when in 1969 we could send a man all the way to the Moon and be in perfect contact with them, when in 2019 I cant walking to the next room without losing your cell phone signal.
←Rate | 05-21-2019 07:14 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I just want to be as happy as the characters in any horror movie are during the first half hour of the film.
←Rate | 07-31-2019 04:40 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon When I was a kid I thought I would never grow up to be the type of person to go out running every morning. And I was right.
←Rate | 09-28-2018 11:02 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just cleaned up my friends list, so if you can see this post it means you've made the cut because your special!....or my worst enemy I just want to keep an eye on.
←Rate | 11-29-2018 02:58 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Life is like a box of chocolates you never know which one you going to get, if you can't follow directions and just look at the little chart on the back of the box.
←Rate | 02-16-2019 23:53 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I think some of my friends are completely irrational and make bad decisions, and we should hang out more.
←Rate | 11-13-2018 13:35 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's amazing how far humans have come since the caveman days when people used to communicate by writing on walls....oh wait, we still do. Never mind.
←Rate | 05-12-2019 12:25 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'll never understand those baby on board signs? Like thanks for letting me know as I was just about to purposely ram my car into yours for absolutely no apparent reason until I saw your sign!
←Rate | 12-15-2018 18:19 by Moon Comments (1)  

   messageicon I just cleaned up my friends list. So if you could see this post it means you've made the cut because you're special! Or my worst enemy I just want to keep an eye on.
←Rate | 01-09-2019 11:24 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Thanks to Facebook birthday reminders I know who to unfriend after thinking who the heck is this person?
←Rate | 06-03-2019 11:50 by Moon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Wish there was a way to turn horrible books back into trees.
←Rate | 09-01-2019 08:53 by Moon Comments (0)  

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