Czovczov Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon You know you are on a hamster wheel when you go to work to make enough money to pay for your car so you can get to work.
←Rate | 10-01-2012 10:19 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you're with the right person, you feel the perfect balance of happy and horny.
←Rate | 04-30-2012 00:55 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you post pictures of yourself flaunting money, I am forced to think you're not used to having it.
←Rate | 12-22-2011 14:59 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon If only my sex life was as consistent as the Adobe updates.
←Rate | 01-13-2013 12:24 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon We're all sex addicts. Some of us just have better dealers.
←Rate | 09-08-2012 14:41 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love yourself, just don’t do it in public. There are laws against that type of behavior.
←Rate | 01-25-2014 03:43 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon It should be a rule that if you're going to put you kid on a leash, you can't be mad if someone walks up, asks if they bite, and pets them
←Rate | 02-03-2014 11:59 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to add tension to a conference call with a surprise toilet flush.
←Rate | 06-15-2013 16:04 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fast food places should have a third window, where you can trade in the wrong stuff they gave you at the second window.
←Rate | 04-17-2013 00:45 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Since Wikipedia is in blackout today, in protest of online anti-piracy laws, can anyone tell me where the G-Spot is?
←Rate | 01-18-2012 12:36 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ever had one of those days that you feel like you should have skipped the coffee and went straight for the booze?
←Rate | 03-27-2012 13:50 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's plenty of fish in the sea, but until I catch one, i'm stuck here just holding my rod
←Rate | 01-03-2012 13:34 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon I would describe my dancing style as “Oh my god, is he having a seizure?”
←Rate | 08-16-2015 10:09 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some guy at work just asked me if I was homosexual. His exact words were "Do you like Twilight?"
←Rate | 12-07-2011 13:30 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whoever invented self checkout greatly overestimated the general intelligence of the human race.
←Rate | 01-13-2013 10:53 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do actors think we care who the they are going to vote for. Make movies and shut up!
←Rate | 10-06-2012 10:31 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've been told by several women that I'm a great listener. A majority of whom, have huge boobs.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 13:47 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon How come people that should never be allowed to reproduce have the most kids?
←Rate | 01-30-2012 08:14 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon I remember when the M in MTV stood for Music not Maternity.
←Rate | 03-12-2012 14:47 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Warning to parents: If you ever catch your kids reading "50 Shades of Grey" WHATEVER YOU DO DON’T spank them.
←Rate | 03-16-2013 14:41 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


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