jimmycos Funny Status Messages

   I went to a Chinese restaurant and saw the sexiest woman I have ever saw, so I was blunt and said I wanna 69...she brought me Beef and Broccoli.

   Just think, next year at this time I will be able to say Happy 2012, but with an evil grin on my face,

   What is the most spontaneous thing you plan on doing?

   I took a train home. Now I don't know how to get it back on the rails...

   Love is often thought of as an emotion that takes time to develop. In reality, love is just a seed that gets planted. It grows when nourished. Fortunately in my case, my seed is a microwave popcorn seed ...

   I had so many great women in my life, yet I don't know where they're at... at least that's what I told the cops ;)

   I'd play Monopoly but I am afraid of the commitment...

   I feel sorry for Perrier water, they were the only ones for a long time...