samdave69 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon doesn't have a beer belly. What I have is a fuel tank for a sex machine......
←Rate | 04-06-2010 18:25 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wants a holiday that somehow follows closely to the 1966 movie: The Endless Summer...... any volunteers?
←Rate | 03-10-2010 03:48 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon loves eating big meals. I especially love a 7 course meal, of which my best is a cheese burger and a six pack of beer.....
←Rate | 03-07-2010 22:32 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon examining one of his patients. Took the husband aside and said: Your wife doesn't look too good. Husband said: I know but she's got an awesome personality...
←Rate | 03-03-2010 22:34 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon finally understood reality is an illusion. It is created by the lack of alcohol...
←Rate | 02-28-2010 22:14 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon procastinating now. Don't see why I should put it off......
←Rate | 02-27-2010 01:55 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks it's only a weak soul that walks towards Alchohol as a 'solution' when the going gets tough. Not me though - I sprint towards it....
←Rate | 02-26-2010 08:48 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Alzheimers: You wake up and wonder who's sleeping next to you, where you are, what you did the night before, why you're naked..... kinda like college, isn't it?
←Rate | 02-08-2010 22:56 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ashley cole was arrested for speeding!! In his defence, he was told tht John Terry's car was parked outside his house!!!
←Rate | 02-06-2010 09:51 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon saw a middle-eastern friend shaking a carpet on 6th floor balcony. I called out "whats up ahmed, won't it start?"
←Rate | 02-05-2010 22:07 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon veni, vidi, velcro. I came, I saw, I stuck around...
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:53 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon : Everytime I hear the dirty word "excercise", I wash my mouth with chocolate.....
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:32 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon pays tribute to Mickey Mouse who will turn 82 years old this year. He's now the oldest rodent in show business, unless you count that thing on Donald Trump's head....
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:30 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon saw a naked man running down his road. I rolled down the car window and asked "hey why are you running stark naked " to which the naked man replied "because you are home early....."
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:27 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Confucius he say, man who sit on tall toilet is high on pot...
←Rate | 02-04-2010 23:20 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Confucius say: Man who go to sleep with sexual problem, wake up with solution in hand....
←Rate | 02-04-2010 22:21 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon a cookbook is like a Danielle Steele novel for chubby girls....
←Rate | 02-04-2010 12:57 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon lives with fear everyday. Sometimes she lets him go fishing....
←Rate | 02-04-2010 12:46 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wakes up grumpy, but most days he just lets her sleep....
←Rate | 02-04-2010 12:45 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon red meat is not bad for you. Green furry meat is....
←Rate | 02-04-2010 10:07 by samdave69 Comments (0)  



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