Onecuwldood Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon The best things in life are free...............So how many kittens do you want?
←Rate | 08-12-2011 21:28 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
←Rate | 08-07-2011 21:09 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
←Rate | 08-07-2011 21:07 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
←Rate | 08-07-2011 21:06 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon When offering an apology, if you include buts... and excuses it kind of negates the apology... What do you think?
←Rate | 07-14-2011 23:02 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was SHUT UP .
←Rate | 07-08-2011 00:30 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon Someone asked me for my email address today, I don't know, I never email myself!!!
←Rate | 07-03-2011 20:04 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon I will be hosting the next meeting of the Somerset Time Travel club. It will be held Wednesday of last week. We will be serving breakfast for supper. Please plan to attend! We really missed you next week.
←Rate | 06-18-2011 15:02 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ok, so they have GPS that can navigate you all the way across the country...why can't someone invent a device that can remind you why you went into a room?
←Rate | 06-11-2011 15:37 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon This copy of Windows is not genuine... Dang, I'll never find that guy that sold me Windows from the trunk of his car... He seemed legit. Lesson learned.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 20:02 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ok let me see if I have this straight. When counting calories, if you forget to write them down, you don't have to count them, right?
←Rate | 04-22-2011 17:29 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon Note to self: That was way to much beer!
←Rate | 03-20-2011 09:24 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon Man sitting at home on the verandah with his wife and he says, "I love you." She asks, "Is that you or the beer talking?" He replies, "It's me............. talking to the beer."
←Rate | 03-10-2011 22:23 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon WOW! Can you believe Justin Bieber is 17 today, seems like just yesterday she was just a little girl playing in her room with her karaoke machine. Next thing you know she'll find a nice guy and get married and start having kids of her own.
←Rate | 03-01-2011 06:23 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon I failed this quiz question... Where do women mostly have curly hair? Apparently the answer is Africa! Who knew?!?!
←Rate | 02-24-2011 16:37 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon My friend is having sex with his GF and her twin, asked how he tells them apart, he said her brother has a mustache!
←Rate | 02-24-2011 16:35 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
←Rate | 09-23-2010 16:18 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why are they calling the music I grew up on "Classic Rock"? I'm not that old...am I?
←Rate | 09-12-2010 01:15 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon To those who do not believe that war is the answer... Please enjoy your "Independence Day". Heck enjoy the whole weekend.
←Rate | 07-02-2010 16:46 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sure it's flattering and weird at the same time, but you need to stop thinking of me when you masturbate...
←Rate | 05-06-2010 11:01 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  




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