Timboss Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon The only reason I would want to see Donald Trump elected as president is so we could see what his hair does when he gets off of that big helicopter...
←Rate | 04-30-2011 02:10 by timboss Comments (2)  


   messageicon seeing William and Harry all decked out in their uniforms yesterday.. I kept expecting them to break into that Sondheim tune from "Into The Woods" AGONY!
←Rate | 04-30-2011 14:40 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Osama bin Laden... WINNING! .. Yours truly, Charlie Sheen..
←Rate | 05-02-2011 09:02 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon Attention Al Qaeda recruits: Due to recent events, practice on the hand over hand monkeybars will be cancelled indefinitely.
←Rate | 05-08-2011 01:49 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate when my winks and happy faces are split.. and continued on the next line :-/
←Rate | 06-07-2011 15:00 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just went to that God wants you to know app.. It said, "Nothing" :-/
←Rate | 07-11-2011 19:21 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon needs some comfort food.. Oh wait! I ate it already.. :-/
←Rate | 08-05-2011 22:18 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm sorry Febreeze.. I don't believe the commercials where you take the two blindfolded women into a crack house and the kitchen with the decaying meat tray and they smell Yosimte National Park.. :-/
←Rate | 08-23-2011 11:41 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon Quote of the week "Tactically, it's all going as planned.." Qaddafi
←Rate | 08-24-2011 07:20 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon just saw where the movie "Ground Hog Day" is coming on tonight.. Oh.. Wait a minute.. That's President Obama's job speech.. sorry
←Rate | 09-08-2011 07:43 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon I really should bring the chair at work home with me so I can get some sleep at night...
←Rate | 09-12-2011 00:29 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon Can you imagine how different the story would have been if Fritz hadn't dropped the "normal" brain?
←Rate | 10-29-2011 23:53 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing aggravates me more than to hear a career politician say, "I am not a career politician."
←Rate | 12-29-2011 11:48 by Timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hope my CEO doesn't come here as the Undercover Boss cause I'd be like, "Ahh, don't worry about that mess. It'll be there tomorrow... BREAK TIME!"
←Rate | 01-16-2012 01:38 by Timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon it just me? Or are the three finalists at the end of Funniest Home Videos never the funniest?
←Rate | 01-17-2012 07:20 by Timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gee honey, I would have taken the trash out.. But I slipped and fell into the lifeboat..
←Rate | 01-18-2012 19:42 by Timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon When going out for sea food, I always order shark steak. Not because I like it.. but to show THEM who is really on top of the food chain.
←Rate | 01-25-2012 21:11 by Timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon My stomach just growled so hard I thought I was getting a text message.
←Rate | 04-22-2012 11:32 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just went out and witnessed the transit of venus.. Now I have no retinas...
←Rate | 06-05-2012 19:00 by timboss Comments (0)  


   messageicon Rest in Peace Sheriff Taylor.. You will be remembered and loved.
←Rate | 07-03-2012 12:12 by timboss Comments (0)  




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