Thejoke.cafe Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'Thejoke.cafe': View All Messages
Page: 2 of 4

   messageicon I just got offered a great deal from Vodafone. A new Samsung phone and a free fire extinguisher.
←Rate | 10-11-2016 13:08 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon America’s policy of shooting first and asking questions later has always been their downfall. I mean, just think how useful King Kong could have been on September the 11th.
←Rate | 10-12-2016 13:33 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think I promised to have three beers, and be home by ten. I always get those two mixed up.
←Rate | 10-12-2016 13:37 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon I caught my wee brother sniffing my girlfriend’s knickers today. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I’ve been wearing them all week.
←Rate | 10-17-2016 11:11 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Filled the tank up with petrol today. Now all the fish are dead.
←Rate | 10-17-2016 11:13 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon If a woman says she’s wrong, is she still wrong?
←Rate | 10-17-2016 11:13 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why did my wife cross the road? To get back to the first shoe shop we went in three hours ago.
←Rate | 10-17-2016 11:14 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook, making people who would’nt talk in the street wish each other Happy Birthday since 2004.
←Rate | 10-17-2016 11:14 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife’s leaving me as I’m too controlling. It’s ok though, I’m not letting her.
←Rate | 10-17-2016 11:14 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon I work as a waiter. The pay isn’t great but I put food on the table.
←Rate | 10-22-2016 11:09 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Waitress: ‘Do you have any questions about the menu?’ Me: ‘Yes. What kind of font is this?’
←Rate | 10-22-2016 11:09 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon The most used electrical appliance in the wife’s kitchen is the smoke alarm.
←Rate | 10-22-2016 11:14 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon For the past month I have woken up to find hundreds of flowers with no heads all over my doorstep, garden and drive. I think I’m being stalked
←Rate | 10-22-2016 11:15 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Only a few years ago, the average parents had four children. Nowadays, the average child has four parents.
←Rate | 10-22-2016 11:15 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do gun manuals have a "trouble shooting?" section?
←Rate | 10-25-2016 02:23 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think Christmas must be near, The bin man said good morning to me.
←Rate | 10-26-2016 11:47 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I was young at bedtimes my mum always told me a story with a happy ending. One of the benefits of having a mum from Thailand I suppose.
←Rate | 10-26-2016 11:48 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet? Because she didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills.
←Rate | 10-26-2016 11:48 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon A pessimist’s blood type is always b-negative.
←Rate | 10-26-2016 11:49 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you want to work for a company that makes moisturiser, the best thing to do is to apply daily.
←Rate | 10-26-2016 11:51 by thejoke.cafe Comments (0)  




[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left