Matt Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon How the hell did a generation raised on South Park and Family Guy become so offended by everything?
←Rate | 06-26-2021 10:19 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm never eating a edible again. I watched an entire movie on mute and started crying because I thought I was deaf.
←Rate | 09-18-2021 13:50 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon in heat. Blame spring and short skirts... time to spray and pray.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 22:15 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon Powered off the smart phone felt like I was having a heart attack...
←Rate | 05-19-2012 01:23 by matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon knows the last digit of PI.
←Rate | 09-02-2009 00:41 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon Calories? I think you mean delicious points!
←Rate | 05-20-2021 17:24 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon Should hallways in mental institutes be called psycho-paths?
←Rate | 05-16-2021 17:42 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff some guys pay money for in later life.
←Rate | 06-21-2021 17:39 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't hear any cicadas. I believe everyone is eating them all...
←Rate | 05-29-2021 19:26 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon If anyone gets a message from me about canned meat don't open it. It's spam.
←Rate | 07-27-2021 16:23 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon If tomatoes are considered fruits, isn’t ketchup a smoothie?
←Rate | 05-17-2021 13:06 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon On the internet, you have a better chance of surviving The Oregon Trail than a trip to WebMD!
←Rate | 05-16-2021 17:48 by Matt Comments (0)  


   messageicon When men don't shave for a while it's rugged and masculine. When women don't shave for a while it's rugged and masculine
←Rate | 07-18-2021 10:51 by Matt Comments (0)  



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