CJ Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon I got a postcard from my gynecologist. It said, "Did you know it's time for your annual check-up?" No, but now my mailman does.
←Rate | 02-02-2010 17:45 by cj Comments (0)  

   messageicon Do you know why Californians love Thanksgiving Day?...It's the only time of year they get to see natural breast!
←Rate | 11-16-2011 10:34 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon girls have unique powers they get wet without water, bleed without an injury & make boneless things get hard.
←Rate | 03-10-2010 14:18 by cj Comments (0)  

   messageicon If Tylenol, duct tape and a band-aid can't fix it...you've got serious problems.
←Rate | 03-10-2010 14:28 by cj Comments (0)  

   messageicon No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her $hit.
←Rate | 06-05-2010 12:52 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon I hate it when you look in a car window to fix ur hair.. after standing there for 5 minutes... you see someone in the car...
←Rate | 03-23-2012 22:13 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon My relationship status just changed to sweatpants oreos and netflix!
←Rate | 04-02-2013 01:44 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Have you noticed each generation is getting ruder and shorter?
←Rate | 09-28-2011 11:47 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Some open minds should be closed for repairs.
←Rate | 08-02-2011 12:30 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Think about this. Somebody in the world right now couldn't imagine life without you. That alone should give you the strength to smile.
←Rate | 11-21-2011 20:13 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon BATHROOM: A room used by the entire family, believed by all except Mom to be self-cleaning.
←Rate | 02-17-2011 14:54 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Guess who just discovered the bipolar emoticon? :):
←Rate | 09-28-2011 13:19 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Rhinos are really just old, fat unicorns. Don't argue. you know i'm right.
←Rate | 01-14-2012 10:22 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Condoms Prevent Minivans!!
←Rate | 01-31-2012 00:18 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Based on my wardrobe, dog hair is my favorite color:)
←Rate | 04-28-2012 01:09 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon When I say “Nevermind.” I really mean you should've listened the first time
←Rate | 09-28-2011 11:45 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Losing friends and alienating people, one day at a time!
←Rate | 08-22-2011 14:32 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's time for my weekly game of, "Let's see how long I can drive with my gas light on."
←Rate | 04-02-2013 01:46 by CJ Comments (1)  

   messageicon Toy Story must have been written by a woman. Who else would name their toys Woody and Buzz!!
←Rate | 01-06-2012 20:20 by CJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Today........"WORK" is a 4 letter word!!
←Rate | 07-08-2011 16:10 by CJ Comments (2)  

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