Danmanz Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon With all the police and medical shows taking over primetime TV, you figured one could skip all of college to be in the field of criminal justice and medical.
←Rate | 06-09-2010 07:39 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Something women would NEVER say: "This diamond is too big"
←Rate | 06-08-2010 18:06 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I'm Tom Bodett of Motel 6, we'll leave the Lysol on for ya"
←Rate | 06-08-2010 18:05 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon When the world kicks you when you're down, breaks its legs.
←Rate | 06-08-2010 18:04 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Something a wife would NEVER say to her husband: "Could you please stop washing the dishes and sit down and have a beer with me, I can't hear the game!"
←Rate | 06-08-2010 18:02 by Danmanz Comments (1)  


   messageicon Motels....Because you and your hooker deserve better than the backseat of some car.
←Rate | 06-08-2010 18:02 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know who's going to take the title between the Celtics & Lakers......Football season that's who.
←Rate | 06-08-2010 18:00 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon She had a Coca-Cola body....too bad it was the 2-Liter version.
←Rate | 06-01-2010 21:27 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon With all that weight loss, 50 Cent looks like one of those crazy people from "I Am Legend"
←Rate | 05-30-2010 12:07 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Please! You're only older than me because your parents decided to have unprotected sex before mine did. At least mine didn't make a mistake that night.
←Rate | 05-28-2010 22:45 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Saying "Let me call you back" is just a nicer or rather messed up way for a woman to say she doesn't wanna talk to you.
←Rate | 05-28-2010 22:30 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon You ever seen somebody so damn ugly the government should transfer their birthday to Halloween??....Yeah, me too.
←Rate | 05-26-2010 16:47 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon My dog was barking at the back door and my wife was yelling at the front door. I always let the dog in first because at least its shuts up when it gets in the house.
←Rate | 05-23-2010 23:01 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Quite a number of women put "Ugh" in their statuses to show the stress and pain of their "situation." To me it almost sounds like you're constipated. "Ugh!! I really don't wanna go to work today, ugh!"
←Rate | 05-23-2010 02:21 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did you ever stop to think if some of your friends were actually resulting mistakes made by their parents'...."Get-Together?"
←Rate | 05-22-2010 20:35 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon When the World calmly tells you, "Give Up" on your struggles to success, You whisper back and say, "Hell...No"
←Rate | 05-21-2010 11:01 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet Quagmire has tons of child support to pay.
←Rate | 05-19-2010 01:35 by Danmanz Comments (1)  


   messageicon For the person who picked on you in school, stole your boyfriend/girlfriend from you, spread lies and rumors about you, didn't help you in anyway possible....all of a sudden......wants to be your friend on Facebook.
←Rate | 05-18-2010 17:40 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you hated taking quizzes in school, why the hell are you doing them on Facebook......and putting them on my News Feed?
←Rate | 05-18-2010 17:39 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know what''s so scary, but just so sexy at the same time? A hot woman kicking your a$$ in video games.....in your room.....on your bed.
←Rate | 05-17-2010 17:23 by Danmanz Comments (0)  




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