Danmanz Funny Status Messages

   Try NOT. Do…or do not. There is no try. ~ Master Yoda (Star Wars)

   With all the police and medical shows taking over primetime TV, you figured one could skip all of college to be in the field of criminal justice and medical.

   For some of the rich & famous around the world. it's really sad that they can buy whatever they WANT, but have to beg for what they NEED.

   You are born to move mountains but you're still stuck on rocks.

   A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.

   You can tell the size of a person by the size of the problems that gets them down. Be bigger than your problems.

   You ever wonder how much more advanced this whole world would be IF we only had one religion AND racism never existed?

   Cut off fake people for real reasons, NOT real people for fake reasons.

   Surround yourself with Contenders, not Pretenders.

   If Obama was Pepsi and Romney was Coca-Cola, then I would definitely drink water or tea.

   The foods that prison inmates eat are more nutritious than the food in school cafeterias......Just let that sink in for a bit.

   Sean Hannity: "Do you have any regrets of specific actions you did on that February night?" George Zimmerman: "No...I feel that it was all God's plan and for me to second guess or judge it...No sir" Me: (facepalm)

   I spilled ice out of my cup while I was outside and all of a sudden, my state has shutdown.

   You take the Kennedy assassination + That Clinton and Lewinsky thing + A pretty boss lady with small, slutty tendencies and BAM...You got a show on ABC called Scandal.

   I'm still waiting on the movie 'Twilight: Lights Out' starring Blade to come out.

   I bet you'll never see a fight break out in marijuana clubs.........

   Girls FB Account: 47 Friend Requests, 17 Messages, 31 Notifications..........Boys FB Account: 1 Notification.

   Pushing the elevator button repeatedly doesn't make the elevator go faster.....you do realize that right.....?

   A man will simply break a woman's heart, but a woman will take a dump in a man's heart and walk away.

   50% of marriages end in divorce and the other 50% end by a "relationship status" on facebook.