BEGO Funny Status Messages

   If the fate of humanity ever rests on me filling out an online survey, we're pretty much doomed.

   The Killer in me is the Killer in you.

   Just ran over my neighbor's cat, but I left a note saying "Curiosity was here" I'm probably safe, right?

   I'm just a man but if you want I can still be your superman or prince charming! ♥

   "I'm sick of beautiful people who don't have to work for their beauty, when I'm over here sweatin my balls off for all this beauty."

   I've always wanted to know what was Victoria's secret…

   This Donut-Scented Car Air Freshener will more than pay for itself next time I get pulled over.

   When girls get mad, they cry to their friends. We go cuss people out on Xbox.

   Remember fellas, no matter how good or so hot she looks, and yet she's single it most likely means someone got tired of putting up with her B.S.

   Becareful, the only reason some people decide to get married is just so they can start blaming someone else for their disaster of self.

   Will you write on your girlfriend's Facebook wall telling her how much you love each her?" ~Said Nobody, ever.

   Texts that piss me off: 1. Yeah 2. Oh 3. Yup 4. Lol 5. Haha 6. K 7. Nope 8. Chillin 9. Naw

   The only reason my heart appears cold and black is because I have my real heart locked in an indestrucible black heart shaped box and cryogenically frozen to prevent further damage.

   I just scrolled sooo far back on Facebook's Timeline... I wound up back over on MySpace.

   I just saw one of my friends on Facebook post a status like. MY DAUGHTER MUST BE SO POPULAR I HEAR PHONE VIBRATING ALL NIGHT.. A okkkk its not a phoneee

   A woman should know how to look like a girl, how to act like a lady, how to think like a man." :)

   I cant wait till I am old and I go up to my grandkids and be like. Did you know that back in my day Eevee only had three evolutions. And they be like, Shut uo grandpa no one plays Pokemon anymore..

   Jail, I mean school. Sorry, I can't tell the difference

   Prvo me upoznaj pa mi onda sudi, a ne po tome što pričaju ljudi ! :)

   New year resolution- nothing better to start the year than by making more rules to break over the year.