bego Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Smart phones, smart cars, smart everything... Where are all the smart people?
←Rate | 06-01-2012 21:39 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you wear Hollister past seventh grade I'm just gonna assume you enjoy the taste of another man's schlong.
←Rate | 08-16-2013 22:06 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon When in a relationship, a real man doesn't make his woman jealous of others, he makes others jealous of his woman
←Rate | 04-12-2014 23:24 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man
←Rate | 01-02-2013 21:08 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every week almost 30 people die from FDA approved drugs while Marijuana remains illegal with 0 deaths.
←Rate | 07-27-2012 12:39 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Best prank call ever: "Hello, Dominos?"... "Yes, how may I help you?"... "What's the number to call Pizza Hut?"
←Rate | 04-06-2012 22:39 by BEGO Comments (1)  


   messageicon Somebody needs to start a restaurant called "Chick-Fil-Atheist" that's only open on Sunday.
←Rate | 08-01-2012 21:58 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Seriously, there's a fine line between tan and looking liked you rolled around in Doritos.
←Rate | 06-07-2011 22:00 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Best childhood memory? Falling asleep on the couch, then waking up in your bed the next morning..
←Rate | 03-09-2012 21:38 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Where you find true friendship, You find true love.
←Rate | 02-25-2011 21:43 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook = Star Wars, Twitter = Empire Strikes Back, Google+ = Return of the Jedi. MySpace = Stupid prequels.
←Rate | 07-11-2011 12:28 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever someone posts something like, โ€œJust went on a massive friend-deleting spree!,โ€ I'm never quite sure whether to feel like a winner for making the cut or a loser for having friends lame e
←Rate | 07-19-2011 15:56 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm speeding because I have to get there before I forget where I was going, Officer.
←Rate | 07-29-2011 23:36 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't need damn a brain, I have google.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 00:44 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon A wife is somebody who won't tell you what to do but will get mad when you don't do what she wanted you to do.
←Rate | 09-22-2011 17:36 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know what I really hate? When I miss someones call by a few minutes and when I call back they don't answer
←Rate | 09-23-2011 22:54 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon People say best friends are hard to find. That's because the best one's already mine.
←Rate | 04-22-2011 22:58 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder...should we give that a try?
←Rate | 08-05-2011 23:15 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just saw my auto insurance agent use a calculator to calculate 2017-2013 to show me it's been 4 years......... time for a new insurance company. ๐Ÿ˜…
←Rate | 10-17-2017 23:39 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon All voicemails from my Dad start with "HELLO! HELLO!" and end with him trying to dial another number.
←Rate | 04-02-2017 21:58 by BEGO Comments (0)  




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