Goodeolboy Funny Status Messages

   I wish the string on my weedeater had a Hollywood clip.

   It's universal, to point out old skool soda cans and chip bags during classic movies.

   Click like if you almost cried when Trey said,"Yo Dough...You still got one Brotha left!".

   Uh-huh...my underwear is!! -my excuse since Kindergarten. #stpattys

   Breaking: Denver complaining of contact high...they swear.

   My number is #0. Which is good 'cause I'm from [insert home town] and you probably know it already

   It's so hot here, gangsters are doing drive bys with squirt guns.

   She's trained right when you roll up to pump fuel, and she jumps out to clean the windows.

   When I say I have "true grit" right now, I'm not talking about how tough I am. Just that I happend to smile during this dust storm :/

   When I'm the designated driver, I want to look cool ordering my drink. So I ask for a Jack and Dr. Pepper hold the Jack.

   Dear In and Out Burger, I hate you!! Signed, Someone Who Works Down the Street

   ...but where I come from, rain is a good thing.

   I know I can't be the only one here hitting these ads by mistake trying to go to the next page.

   it takes six licks to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop! (with a slight crunch)

   To all the merchants trying to make a buck off of Christmas...Go elf yourself!

   Where do babies come from? Two teenagers and a six-pack

   Am I the only one that thinks some of the Japanese players will be executed? #fifa

   Settling in for the night with a glass of orange juice and the Dukes of Hazzard.

   Reading the first dozen pages, reminds me of reading something from the 50s...so wholesome.

   there anything worse than being on vacation, and your copy of Enter The Dragon won't play because of a scraaaaatch????