Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny status message updates for FaceBook or Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon How else can I say this.. "STOP PUTTING YOUR PHONE ON FULL BLAST AND WATCHING VIDEOS IN A RESTAURANT, YOU STUPID INCONSIDERATE F***!!!"...
←Rate | 11-12-2018 19:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Does it get any more dumber? There are Trump supporters in Florida with signs demanding that the Broward county clerk STOP counting votes because they want to save our democracy.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 19:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Řay Riley/Řay is an idiot.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 19:14 by IDTN Comments (0)  


   messageicon Paris trip? More like Putin trip.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 17:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate saying this as an America, but as a Trump hater, I'm ecstatic that the DOW is dropping and hitting rock bottom. Sometimes, you need to see a huge failure before you admit what a mistake people made.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 16:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon According to Trump, Obama was responsible for 9/11. I don't know anymore if this is hatred or just stupidity...
←Rate | 11-12-2018 16:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw Big Bird trying to hitchhike. I asked him where he's going. He said "I'm going to Florida, to teach them how to count".
←Rate | 11-12-2018 16:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fun Fact: Ted Bundy was a Repub1ican campaign worker.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 16:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We will never forget 9/11 ...... And will aways regret 11/9.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 15:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon RIP Stan Lee. Excelsior!
←Rate | 11-12-2018 14:12 by Cicci Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wonder if failing to show up to honor fallen soldiers on Veterans Day because of rain, is considered unpatriotic?
←Rate | 11-12-2018 11:51 Comments (4)  


   messageicon In a world where you can do anything, do it over there.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 10:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Airport security asked me if I'd seen anything unusual. Well, I just paid eighteen dollars for a turkey sandwich and a bottle of beer, let's start with that.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 10:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you use the self-service checkout lanes at Wal-mart, you should get a discount like you do when you buy self-service gasoline.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 10:17 Comments (1)  


   messageicon If laziness was an Olympic sport, I would want to come in Fourth so I wouldn't have to walk up to the podium.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 09:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thanks to synonyms, "Forgive me Father for I have sinned," and "Sorry Daddy, I've been naughty," both mean the same thing.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 09:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some recipes are like science fiction. I read to the end and think "Well, that's not going to happen."
←Rate | 11-12-2018 09:05 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A terrorist attack has blown away two houses - one made of straw and the other made of wood. Police think that it's probably a lone wolf!
←Rate | 11-12-2018 05:44 by Truman Comments (0)  


   messageicon If one despises losers, and one is a loser. Does that loser despise them self ?
←Rate | 11-12-2018 05:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Celebrate Thanksgiving by giving people the bird.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 04:11 by Ha.ha Comments (0)  



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