mullerman Funny Status Messages

   thinks the most used sexual position amoung married couples is doggy style, the husband sits and begs and the wife rolls over and plays dead.

   thinks that everyone has the ability of making someone happy, some by entering the room, others by leaving it.

   the difference between an in-law and an out-law is that outlaws are wanted....

   after all those years working at the Nuclear Power Plant, Uncle Ron was the hands-down favorite to win the 3-legged race.

   loves long walks...especially when taken by people who annoy me.

   “We don't stop laughing because we grow old; We grow old because we stop laughing”

   thinks Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with it.

   been married for 20 years and has sex almost every day....almost Monday, almost Tuesday, almost Wednesday.....

   asks...the difference between my boss and the pope? The pope only expects me to kiss his ring

   If you fall, I'll be there - The Floor

   says, forgive your enemies, but remember their names.

   thinks it's better to be "over the hill" then under it.

   annoyed that he can't play UNO. The Mexican's keep stealing my green cards.

   says if you want to feel skinny, hang out with a group of fat people.

   thinks that friends are the most important part of your life. Treasure the tears, treasure the laughter, but most importantly, treasure the memories

   wants you to think of the word "Politics". Poly means "many" and "ticks" are blood sucking creatures.

   Preserve nature....pickle a squirrel.

   wants you to remember the "Golden Rule"....whoever has the gold, makes the rules.

   says, I love work. I can sit and watch it all day.

   asks..what's the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.