jimmycos Funny Status Messages

   Remember when you ordered from Columbia House... the first 5 times?

   it me or does everyone get sick of pancakes by the time you are done eating them...

   I don't need alcohol to have a good time. I need it to make sure I don't have a bad time...

   That time of year again where in a few days we will be able to buy Hearts filled with chocolates for 75% off.

   Have you ever eaten a Hot Dog backwards?

   I remember the days when we actually used our phones to talk to each other.

   I am living vicariously through myself...

   For a minute there, I thought I had just wasted 60 seconds...

   Ever have one of those friends that has been there for you, took interest in what you do then just stops talking to

   So let me ask you guys... I don't hear anything about Farmville these days. Did you guys sellout to Monsanto?

   Lick the alphabet. Yea, you know what I am talking about, don't even lie.

   I need someone really bad. Are you really bad?

   I need a damn girlfriend...well not a "damn" girlfriend, just a girlfriend...well not just a girl that's a friend but...a girl...well, not a girl, but a woman...OMG I am turning into Mr. Kimball! Damn you, Green Acres!

   "Cheating" is such a harsh word. I prefer "Monogamously Challenged".

   With names like "Batman" and "Robin", you'd think they could fly...

   I think it's interesting that "cologne" rhymes with "alone".

   I am wondering if Snoop Dog ever watched Charlie Brown.

   Who wants to bet me I don't have a gambling problem?

   If life taught me anything, it's that Mikey will eat anything...

   Do you like Parrots? Do you like Parrots? Do you like Parrots? Do you like Parrots?