BONNIE Funny Status Messages

   A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

   Q. What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? A. We better get some support or people will think we're nuts.

   It is hard to understand how a cemetery can raise its burial costs and blame it on the higher cost of living.

   Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

   Honk if you love peace and quiet.

   Really suffering from PMS today - Premature Monday Syndrome.

   The best part of life is when your family becomes your friends, and your friends become your family.

   Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but sometimes it's good to see who cares enough to break them down.

   The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

   put your big girl panties on... and DEAL WITH IT!

   I vote for a 3 day weekend and a 4 day work week.

   OK, I'm going to admit it. Its been bugging me for about 10 years now and I need to get it off my chest. I let the dogs out.

   What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? el-if-i-no

   Nobody notices what I do..until I don't do it.

   A bill collector came to my house the other day, so I gave him a huge stack of my old bills.

   Not a gal that finds it attractive or even complimenting when a married man hits on her. Keep it at home base, dude.

   Sex is like Chinese food. 2 hours later, you want more.,

   You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.

   Royal Wedding+Media=Dead Horse

   A headache: Not how I expected to start my weekend... I was thinking more of ENDING it with one!