huck Funny Status Messages
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I just told someone that I have to pee pee. It's hard toggling back and forth between being a parent and being a dude.
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12-10-2013 05:43 by Huck
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Stevie Wonder just filed for divorce. He wanted to not see other people.
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08-04-2012 06:59 by Huck
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The jerk store called. *removes hat* I'm afraid there's been an accident.
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12-27-2014 07:16 by huck
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How to avoid getting the short end of the stick? Just stop sharing sticks! There are enough sticks out there that you can have your own.
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05-28-2014 05:28 by Huck
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My sister is going to a theme park tomorrow. I told her to have fun. Frightening to think what could've happened had I not shared that tip
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08-21-2013 13:03 by huck
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Really, Fresh Prince's mother? One little fight and you ship him across the continent? You won't get a "#1 Mom" mug from me, I assure you.
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05-18-2014 06:45 by Huck
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The first rule of Illiteracy Club is no reading. That was a test, and you failed. You're failing now. You're not welcome in Illiteracy Club.
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05-01-2014 06:33 by Huck
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People are so excited about the 100m Olympic times, but Jason Voorhees could beat all those clowns just walking.
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08-07-2012 08:54 by Huck
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When a pizza guy comes to my door I like to answer wearing the same uniform as him with an empty pizza box then insist that he called me
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10-03-2015 09:35 by huck
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Knock on your neighbors door and ask if they've seen your cat. When they say no pull your cat out of your pocket and make introductions
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12-27-2014 07:37 by huck
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Fact: Dogs don't like when you pet their fur in the wrong direction because it exposes the tribal tattoos they got in college
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01-23-2015 12:25 by huck
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In Oregon a Labradoodle was unharmed after falling off a 200 ft cliff. Some suspect that he actually jumped because of the name "Labradoodle".
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10-08-2014 21:24 by huck
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Supreme Court rules Arizona police may not stop people they believe are illegal immigrants, but must stop Juggalos.
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06-26-2012 06:24 by Huck
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I'm starting to think Chris Brown is in Fight Club
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01-29-2013 06:35 by Huck
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I'm a card carrying member of Card Carriers. I'd show you my card but my hands are full of cards.
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08-25-2012 10:09 by Huck
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Accidentally spilled tear gas, and then realized there's no point in crying over it.
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04-24-2013 06:21 by Huck
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The majority of my childhood was spent naming one of my settlers in Oregon Trail after an enemy then doing all I could to help them die of dysentery
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09-16-2012 09:09 by Huck
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What I like about you: the way you hold me tight, you know how to dance, you come over at night. Everything else about you repulses me.
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02-15-2014 21:42 by Huck
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I got recognized once. It was at my friend's house. He was all, "Hey, you really should call first." So cool.
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09-06-2012 17:06 by Huck
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I'm a revengetarian. Yeah, strictly vengeance-based diet. It's a lot of waiting around for livestock to be jerks to me
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03-25-2014 05:54 by Huck
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