life Funny Status Messages

   Has been watching your whole life ................. so don't even think about it !

   John travolta was Quoted today saying I hope people look back at my life someday and say at least he had many Happy Endings.

   Life throws you s%it, but the s%it is not always a bad thing, it's taking you to better places…

   I think I'm going to sell everyone else out,,, And be the farmer supplying Life with all these lemons everyone's talking about.

   life is a battle field and there are so many dangers, just when you think it's okay it blows up in your face..

   Wanna hear a joke? Your love life.

   12 simple steps to great life in future…. 1) Walk straight up 2) Make 11 steps in front before jumping off the cliff.

   I'm not worried about my babies or worried about my wife,, I'm just a little bit worried about not ending up with all of that in my life!!

   todays horoscope-Your belief that all of life's problems can be solved by a heart to heart talk and a good nights sleep will be tested when you are introduced to mathmatics.

   I just found out that doves don’t even have tear ducts. Now … I … I just … my whole life has been a lie.

   The akward moment when your college teacher gave you a dead line date for an essay, so you forgot to do it, so you do it at the last day and end up getting a higher grade than your classmates. "THUG LIFE"

   If I ever come back to life as an appliance, I hope it's not as a refrigerator. I bet it's pretty annoying the way people try to cram all those magnets and pictures on you.

   Boy: Hey babe wanna come over later and watch me play COD? Girl: Nah I have this thing.. Boy: What thing? Girl: A life. Boy:.....

   You mean lies like "I never met Stormy Daniel's in my life"?

   Never once in my life have I ever met a dentist in a social situation randomly somewhere outside of a dentist’s office. Think about it.

   does PayPal call anyone else 40 times a day from a 208-515-7481? Them people need to get a life! LOL, I'm not paying you!!

   out making some changes in hisher life...leave a message and I'll get back yo you. if I don't return your message your one of the changes!

   I spent my life searching the world trying to find myself; and when I finally did....I forgot why I was looking!

   When life gives you lemons, get some Tequila and call me

   having a great day! Life is terrifi........i just crapped myself