mtravica Funny Status Messages

   I'm wearing the boxer shorts with the little hearts all over them tonight.... It's probably not a good night to go to jail...

   My update for the week. See you next week.

   its midnight and theres a party next door. I dont know what to bring. I think I'll bring my lawnmower

   I completed one push up without stopping. Normally I go half way then take a break

   My neighbor is sleeping off his hangover on my front lawn again. I think he needs another drink.

   middle of the night and in my boring backyard. No gold to dig up and no dead bodies to bury...sigh

   this is just a temporary status...until I think of something better

   Elderly drivers. Pressing the pedal on the right will make your car go a little faster. Forget all that rubbish about suffocating at speeds above 20 kmh. It was all a myth.

   FEMALE SHOP assistants. When a car mechanic comes to your till, add on a selection of random items they didn't know they needed, and charge them $50 labour costs for the transaction.

   the guy that drives behind me normally chewing his finger was eating a pizza this morning. I was curious to find out the topping so I hit the brakes suddenly. It was pineapple and ham