Yaj Funny Status Messages

   My favorite bible verse is Lunch 12:45

   I wear a mask. I'm vaccinated. You other inbreds our there in the midwest driving around your pickup trucks with 3 teeth and a mullet can contract the virus, spread it to your family and have the whole lot of them cease to breathe.

   I am "I remember when Saturday Night Live Was Funny" years old.

   Congrats Khloe Kardashian! You're father was granted parole!

   It's probably called almond milk because nut juice doesn't sound as enticing..

   It was nice to see Rose from the Titanic do the coin toss..

   Never criticise your husband's faults. It may have been those little imperfections which stopped him from getting a better wife.

   Today I heard a guy on the street say, 'It's chowder season, baby!' so I pushed him in front of a bus because those are awesome last words

   In the dog world, humans are elves that routinely live to be 500+ years old.

   Shoutout to ATM fees for making me buy my own money