TJ Funny Status Messages

   Warning: I break for lawn deer

   Breaking news: Facebook website is down for most users. Twitter will soon follow as it is overwhelmed by tweets asking "Is facebook down?"

   lol at this persons profile http://facebook.com/profile.php?=73322363

   I'm filing my first joint return. No, I'm not getting married, I'm sending the IRS an actual joint with a note that says, 'If you think I'm paying for this war, you must be high.'" --Bill Maher

   If you're not living on the edge you're taking too much space

   "never on schedule, but always on time."

   doing the truffle shuffle

   "not the issue here, Dude."

   200 degrees (that's why they call him Mr. Fahrenheit [he's traveling at the speed of light]).

   carbon based.