Jeffafa Funny Status Messages

   Only 40 days till Christmas... you know what that means? 41 days till I jump back in the dating pool!!

   None of my friends laugh at any of my jokes... maybe these 20 cats really aren't my friends after all :(

   ‪#‎TBT‬ 1990's: Street lights are on; belts off. get your ass home!

   Sweet! McDonalds must be still celebrating St. Patricks day today by dyeing there hamburger meat green! Oh wait....

   According to my calculations, 2025 is going to be the best year ever - I will finally run out of Conditioner the same time as the Shampoo, It's the little things in life I tell ya!

   I was excited about spending some time on my treadmill this morning, but I don't know where I put my roller-blades. ugh.

   Women check me out all the time!! I'm pretty selective on which lane I go to when leaving a store.

   When my daughter grows up, I'm going to start reading her Facebook status's before bedtime. Just so she understands the importance of staying in school!

   Back in the day when I was attracted to a girl I never had enough guts to ask her out. Now with Facebook I am suppose to be confident enough to poke her? #singleforever

   Well this morning I woke up in a box under my tree... I guess I should of been more specific when I told Santa "I want the sexiest person alive for Christmas"!