Czovczov Funny Status Messages

   Let's make humility great again.

   Well, if you're going to question my reputation and credentials as a gynecologist,I suggest you get the hell out of my office van.

   This is not what adulthood looked like in the brochure.

   My Grandpa said, "Your generation relies too much on technology!" I replied, "No, your generation relies too much on technology!" Then I unplugged his life support

   the Republican Presidential race sounds as substantial as Keeping up with the Kardashians.

   "I'm turning over a new leaf" -Adam telling Eve that he's seeing another woman

   Ben Carson endorsing Donald Trump is like Ambien endorsing Cyanide.

   Only if some people knew how silly, stupid and ridiculous they look while holding a selfie stick...

   Yikes. don't google "cream pies", google "cream pie recipes"

   We are about two elections away from deciding President by monster truck rally or burping contest.