Chelsea Funny Status Messages

   Just found out the results of my mammogram - I tested positive for having boobs

   I just made a milkshake and now all the boys are in my yard..

   things I learned from frank sinatra 1. a lady never leaves her escort and 2. a lady doesn't wander all over the room and blow on some other guys dice.

   work me harder, makes me better, do me faster makes me stronger.

   hanging out with charlie sheen, no explanation needed.

   so I go to walmart and see two problems, 1. they have a justin bieber doll and 2. you press his crotch to hear him sing...

   just read that burglars use Facebook to find out when people aren't home... so from now on, i'm at home, with a knife, and a hungry alligator (:

   My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!