Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Official White House response: Donald Trump's in meetings. Journalists with cameras and tourists with iPhones: Donald Trump is definitely golfing.

   Curiously enough, pulling out of Trumpcare is also the GOP's new birth control strategy.

   Don't you people see.... these dummy-crats are trying to peece us off. Lets show them we are bigger than that, and they need a job.

   almost annoyed by the fact that Pablo Escobar spent most of his life tucking in his shirt but he’s only remembered for selling drugs.

   If there is a watermelon why isn't there an earthmelon and firemelon and airmelon? You know…the elemelons

   I'm glad to see most of you are not letting your education get in the way of your ignorance.

   Getting exercise by marching is Trump's new healthcare plan . What an idiot

   At the end of the day the most overused phrase is at the end of the day.

   During the election Syria financialy supported 2 groups... 1SlS and the Clinton campaign.

   One candidate wanted to make America great. The other wanted to get RICH

   Note to self - playing the Trump card isn't as effective when the Trump is a joker.

   Obama is at a All Male Gay resort this weekend. True story.

   Making America great, one round of golf at a time.

   Thanks for all the heroin OBAMA

   Trump's golf instructor gave him a great tip this morning. He would have much better hip rotation if he took his head out of his butt.

   Where are all the peaceful Musl/Ms marching against terrorism?

   Trump hooked hiis drive out of bounds on the sixth hole today. Blames Democrats.

   Several Russian prostitutes seen headed to Trump Golf Course in Virginia today for "meetings".

   Trump is the oldest elected President the US ever had, which means we will witness his transition from paying people to pee on him, to him peeing himself.

   Melania better drink a lot of coffee and water today, because it will take several minutes of getting peed on to help the Donald recover from this blow.