Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon "O.J. , if granted parole where would you live...?" "Well, I'd like to take a stab at Florida......!!"
←Rate | 07-20-2017 19:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I came walking in from the kitchen, and asked my niece for the phonebook. She laughed and called me an antique, Then proceded to gave me her phone.Long story short, the spider's dead, and she's in the living room crying.
←Rate | 07-20-2017 19:41 by @UncleBSolomon Comments (0)  


   messageicon OJ told the judge "I would kill to get out of here".
←Rate | 07-20-2017 19:26 by Deez Nuts Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Dallas Cowboys just offered OJ a 2 year contract.
←Rate | 07-20-2017 19:23 by Deez Nuts Comments (0)  


   messageicon O.J. Simpson is now available for the next season of Dancing With The Stars.
←Rate | 07-20-2017 18:26 by BobW Comments (0)  


   messageicon Congrats Khloe Kardashian! You're father was granted parole!
←Rate | 07-20-2017 15:55 by Yaj Comments (0)  


   messageicon Finally, OJ can go after Nicole's murderer.
←Rate | 07-20-2017 15:51 by JT Comments (0)  


   messageicon The phrase "The Juice is loose" now has a new connotation.
←Rate | 07-20-2017 15:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just found something that will put you to sleep, The OJ Simpson hearing
←Rate | 07-20-2017 14:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you weren't sure whether or not to book a hotel in a Native American community, would that be a reservation reservation reservation?
←Rate | 07-20-2017 11:43 Comments (1)  


   messageicon I wish people in this world would put as much effort into earning respect as they do demanding it.
←Rate | 07-20-2017 08:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Things were said. Feelings were hurt. Your car was set on fire. My point is you’re wrong & Raphael isn’t the best Ninja Turtle. Get over it.
←Rate | 07-20-2017 00:25 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Some things just don't go together, like drinking and driving or pissing and sneezing!!
←Rate | 07-19-2017 15:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Wow, that Hungry Man TV dinner sure lives up to its name!" said no hungry man ever.
←Rate | 07-19-2017 12:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Was watching the old Night of the living Dead. I though how awful that would be. All those smoke detectors beeping from low batteries.
←Rate | 07-19-2017 11:38 by @UncleBSolomon Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's not easy being orange.
←Rate | 07-19-2017 11:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."
←Rate | 07-19-2017 07:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.
←Rate | 07-19-2017 07:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you think sleeping with your wife’s best friend will piss her off then you obviously haven’t tried hiding one of her shoes.
←Rate | 07-19-2017 07:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm going to start a non-profit organization to promote the legalization of marijuana. It will be called the March of Dimebags.
←Rate | 07-19-2017 07:17 Comments (0)  




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