Funny Status Messages

As a Disabled Veteran let me make my opinion very clear. If you take a knee during the National Anthem you are not disrespecting me. YOU ARE HONORING ME. I sacrificed for your freedom to make that choice.

←Rate | 09-28-2017 09:24 Comments (0)

"Goodbye, everyone. I'll remember you all in therapy." -Me, leaving a family reunion.

←Rate | 09-28-2017 08:36 Comments (0)

Technology today is a race between smart people striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof gadgets, and the universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning.

←Rate | 09-28-2017 08:33 Comments (0)

One thing that I have noticed about conspiracy theories is that they all depend on the government perpetrators being endlessly clever. I think you'll find that government perpetrators are endlessly stupid.

←Rate | 09-28-2017 08:32 Comments (0)

Hugh Hefner dead at 91, Financial news, Kleenex is announcing profit lost for next year.

←Rate | 09-28-2017 08:31 Comments (0)

I raise my left hand in salute to you sir. RIP Hugh Hefner.

←Rate | 09-28-2017 06:53 by SLC Comments (0)

Who loves you more; your wife or your dog? Try this test: Lock both of them in the basement for 24 hours. The next day when you open the door, which one will be happy to see you? There's your answer.

←Rate | 09-28-2017 06:47 Comments (0)

Tic toc tic toc tic toc it will soon be MULLER TIME

←Rate | 09-28-2017 06:31 Comments (0)

Now that Hugh Hefner has passed away, do the bunnies get the house?

←Rate | 09-28-2017 06:30 Comments (0)

I see the same women that call Trump a pig..Praising Hugh Hefner tonight. I'll take stupid for $800 Alex

←Rate | 09-28-2017 05:50 Comments (0)

From 10 to 250 and RISING.

←Rate | 09-28-2017 03:27 Comments (0)

That old pervert is gone

←Rate | 09-28-2017 01:28 Comments (0)

So....:it's not okay to have children deported, but it is okay to have them aborted? How does that make sense?!