bego Funny Status Messages

   Haters will broadcast your failure, but whisper your success.

   Facebook is like school. There's the cool kids, the intellectual rebels, and there's always a rumor going on.

   A relationship isn't determined by how many pictures you post on Facebook.

   Say it to my face, not through your status.

   Reasons why I'm still single: ✔ can't date the internet. ✔ can't date my favorite celebrity. ✔ can't date Facebook. ✔ can't date myself..

   Its funny how when I feel my phone vibrate I'll get up to read the text but when my alarm clock goes off in the morning I push snooze like 12 times.

   Longest minutes ever: 1. Waiting on a text 2. Waiting on your food to get out the microwave 3. Commercial while watching a good show.

   I want that "Damn you are still together?" Relationship!

   When the creator of photoshop dies.. All you girls gone go back to being UGLY..

   FACT: Relationships last longer when everybody doesnt know your business

   Ugly chiks with cute kids should get charged with kidnapping... Bit& that aint yo baby!!

   New STD called, FEELINGS. Dont catch that s&it.

   If girlfriend has no texts in their phone history, you are totally being cheated on.

   Phone on silent. 10 missed calls. Turns volume to loudest. Nobody calls All damn Day.

   A bad picture of you, and your automatic response is… “Don't put that on Facebook!”

   Getting back with an ex is pretty much like taking a shower and putting back on your dirty underwear.

   Don't you just hate it when the person you're Facebook-stalking never updates anything.

   if you can just walk away like nothing happened then it never mattered to you in the first place  

   I wonder what it feels like to be one of those pretty girls that all of the guys want.

   In a court of law you're innocent until proven guilty. In a relationship you're guilty until proven innocent.