santa AND presents AND christmas AND xmas AND holidays AND elfs Funny Status Messages

   On Dasher, On Dancer, On Prancer, On VISA!!! Christmas shopping time.

   Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.

   letting everyone know in advance that I want something shiny that will go from 0 to 120 in 3 seconds for Christmas... and bathroom scales WILL NOT be accepted.

   Keep it up and Santa's going to stick a candy caine where the sun don't shine.3 hours ago clear

   plans on dressing up as Kanye West for Halloween and just before the kids yell "Trick or Treat", jump out of the bushes and yell "Christmas is better".

   santa's overated.

   Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!!

   thinks Santa Claus has the right idea. Only visit people once a year

   considered atheism, but there weren't enough holidays.

   wondering what the hell Jesus ever did for Santa on his Birthday?

   wonders if dyslexic devil worshipers sell their soul to Santa

   got Santa in a headlock

   the reason Santa even has a naughty list!!!!!

   waiting for Santa to smack me and say ho ho ho