santa AND presents AND christmas AND xmas AND holidays AND elfs Funny Status Messages

   I finally got my own back for Christmas shopping: I took my girlfriend into eight different pubs without getting a drink and then went back into the first one and bought a pint.

   liked to climb trees as a kid....until I fell and broke all the Christmas presents.

   Dear Santa, Let me explain about last year..

   I've always been suspicious of people who operate their Christmas lights after New Years day.

   reading Santa's Naughty Girls list...... Thank you Wikileaks

   trying to think of a good way to show off to everyone the superman underwear I got for Christmas.

   The hospitals are running low on plasma and need donations. Apparently people bought more TVs for Christmas than they expected so they need to make more.

   Well the Christmas spirit is boxed up and back into the attic for another year.

   wishes I would have got a new cell phone from Santa this year.. This rotary texting is really a drag.

   I am the ghost of Christmas Passed Out.

   I wonder if Santa's "list" goes from 12/25-12/25, or does the new list start on January 1st? I think we have a few days to be bad that aren't on record...

   Hey John its your grandmother. Could you tell me how to work this cell phone you got me for Christmas? ~ Sent via payphone.

   Thinking about celebrating Christmas a week after Christmas for now on. Then I will be able to buy the same gifts at 60% off!

   What's the defference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa stopped at 3 Ho's LOL

   Whew.....I am officially done wrapping all of my presents for Christmas in 2011. Thank you 'person who thought of re-gifting'

   loves the Daisy air rifle he got for Christmas and is anxiously awaiting the first Jehovah's Witness to come to the door!

   Pointing And LOLing, At Kids Falling Off Their New RipStik They Got For Christmas.

   Dear Santa, I don't recall asking for a bigger butt for Christmas. It's not that I don't appreciate all the gifts that you brought me, but I'd just like to know... can I exchange it for a smaller size?

   Only 364 shopping days till Christmas..

   Well lets see for Christmas I bought the iPhone,iPad,iTouch.... now iBroke,iHomeless and iRegret...