Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   ..is working on her bad intentions since the road to Hell is paved with good ones.

   if there s a road less travelled... dont take it. you wont find beer.

   The best part about living in a small town is when I don't know what i'm doing,someone else does.

   I lost my mood ring...I'm not sure how I feel about that...

   I sleep like a baby every night. I wake up every three or four hours

   Its funny how Listen and Silent are spelled with the same letters

   2 more for today Do you want some Hot Lesbein Sex and by Lez sex I mean Tea but it will still be hot

   Meaning of Internet fagget according To urban dictonary last I checked is Someone that acts Tough on internet sites but cant back any thing in real life

   A true Solider is Someone that fights not because He Hates whats infront of HIm but Loves What is behind him

   People are like slinkys Useless Stupid But Fun to Push down Stsirs

   A bisexual Is someone that likes Girls as much as the next Guy

   Our Parents Spend half Our Lives Trying to get us to Stand up and talk now they 0nly want to see you sit down and shut up

   Bear Grylls. His name is what he eats... and how he cooks it.

   Lord loves a workin' man; don't trust whitey; see a doctor and get rid of it.

   out making some changes in hisher life...leave a message and I'll get back yo you. if I don't return your message your one of the changes!

   Should've Driven to New York in my Toyota to see Puxotony Phil

   out making some changes in hisher life...leave a message and I'll get back yo you. if I don't return your message your one of the changes!

   good girls go to heaven , Bad girls go everywhere!

   I am cornhoolio, I make peepee from my bunghole

   bubblewrap under his bedsheets, so during the "Heat of Passion" it sounds like FIREWORKS going off!