BEGO Funny Status Messages

   Kids today will never know the pain of the Dewey Decimal system and how to catalog library books on index cards.

   Remember: One man's trash is another man's girlfriend.

   Remember guys, while your checking some other girl out, someone else is checking out your girl. Appreciate what you have, or someone else will.

   If you really cared you wouldn't ignore my text, neglect my feelings and forget my existence.

   WARNING: Unhealthy relationships may cause headaches, stress & a waste of your time. The cure for this is to be single.

   Becareful, the only reason some people decide to get married is just so they can start blaming someone else for their disaster of self.

   16 and pregnant? What about 18 and graduated ? 22 and successful?

   $2.75 Trojans or $19.99 Huggies? You make the decision.

   God made us plain and simple, but we have made ourselves complicated and difficult.

   One loyal Girlfriend is worth more than one hundred hoes..

   Dear girls who take a pic in slutty clothing & glasses & label the caption "nerddd lol" You're not a nerd, you're a w$ore who found glasses

   People who make me do a slight jog because they hold the door open for me when I'm 15 feet away are the first to die when I become God.

   HIGH SCHOOL made everyone either cool , uncool , bisexual , real , fake , pregnant , dropouts , alcoholics , pot heads or somewhere in jail.

   I wonder what the blood alcohol level is of all these mosquitos that keep biting me?

   Baby, are you Jealous? "No..." "Babe, you Jealous?" "NO!" "Baby, can I get a kiss?" "GO AND GET A KISS FROM THE H$E THAT LIKED YOUR STATUS!"

   It's hard to trust someone who starts each sentence with "to be honest".

   Rudeness is a weak man's imitation of strength.

   Smart phones, smart cars, smart everything... Where are all the smart people?

   My favorite condiment is sarcasm, I put it on everything.

   Remember when you blow back up the Capri Sun pouches and try to give them to your friend hoping that they will think it's full?