Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5752 of 6372
thinks the biggest similarity between a Gynaecologist and a Pizza delivery boy is that they both can smell what's in the box.. however they can't sample it!!
←Rate |
07-21-2010 23:23
Comments (0)
If you lose hope, somehow you lose the vitality that keeps life moving, you lose that courage to be, that quality that helps you go on in spite of it all. And so today I still have a dream.
←Rate |
07-21-2010 23:20
Comments (0)
Ever see a flower poking up through a crack in the sidewalk? The crack represents the troubles in your life, the flower is the possibilities.
←Rate |
07-21-2010 23:18 by Paul
Comments (0)
dancing on a table. IT'S FRIDAY NIGHT, BABY!!!!
←Rate |
07-21-2010 23:10
Comments (0)
In an effort to boost sales, some stores are doing a "Christmas in July" completes with holiday music, decorations and sales. Nothing will put you in a buying/holiday/festive mood like Santa in a speedo.
←Rate |
07-21-2010 22:49
Comments (0)
WOW did you ever really look at the word "manslaughter"? Mans Laughter, that's just sick... LOL
←Rate |
07-21-2010 22:47
Comments (0)
Error: Facebook status removed due to awesomeness overload
←Rate |
07-21-2010 22:24
Comments (0)
I finally figured out what the red and blue lights mean on an RCMP cruiser, so they know which side to get in on
←Rate |
07-21-2010 21:54
Comments (0)
remember the police are sort of like dogs, they usually don't chase you unless you run.
←Rate |
07-21-2010 21:30 by L
Comments (0)
I took this personality test on the internet, and it said... "Describe yourself in one word." I answered, "Not good at following instructions."
Got an awesome watch for my birthday. It was waterproof, shockproof, fireproof, bulletproof, acidproof, childproof & scratchproof. I lost it.
The future is that time when you'll wish you'd done what you aren't doing now.
The A/C in my office isn't working and has now officially become an employee.
Money....Here Today, Gone Today!!
←Rate |
07-21-2010 21:06
Comments (0)
Yes, I'm coming to your party. Please introduce me to everyone before I get there, I don't want to have to explain my whole "deal."
←Rate |
07-21-2010 20:58 by gez
Comments (0)
My apartment is where weird foreigners go to have a loud conversation right outside of...
←Rate |
07-21-2010 20:54 by geez
Comments (0)
If ESPN had a cake show, they could call it "Laying Down a Bundt."
←Rate |
07-21-2010 20:51 by geez
Comments (0)
's misery likes tequila, not company.
←Rate |
07-21-2010 20:34
Comments (0)
You know you spend too much time on facebook when you start refering to people by their first, maiden, and last name!
←Rate |
07-21-2010 19:21 by boo
Comments (0)
off to Mamby Pamby land for some self-confidence...
←Rate |
07-21-2010 18:35 by TC
Comments (0)